Our Gus Is An Awesome Gus

From his first post at Little Green Footballs to today, El Gusano has been an enigma,. One minute he appears to be un cognoscente, the next minute he’s bashing his head on worn Naugahyde and comes back with a double-barrel load of stupid.

That’s El Gusano’s first comment on Little Green Footballs. For several years after, he proceeded to spam the LGF comments at a rate previously unheard of [60 posts per day average].

But that was then, and this is then, too.

No he didn’t, Gus, and there was no agreement, Gus, but it’s a step in the right direction, Gus. Nothing pleases our Gus because our Gus is a miserable sack of Gus.

Our Gus is an Awesome Gus.

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Charles Johnson opines on Grotesque Buffoons, Death-Grip Handshakes & Charles Johnson

“Can WE do both?” asks Charles The Organizer, and goes back to greasing his Mossberg.

 

Shaking hands with Charles Johnson would be like squeezing a nerf ball coated with beef suet.

 

Who’s talking about a land war in Asia, Charles? And how in hell can a Nancy with fake eyebrows give a “death-grip” to anyone?

Yep. That’s some cutting-edge “News Aggregation” right there. Stalk much, Charles? #Rumpswab


Would You Be Comfortable With Charles F. Johnson Sleeping On An Inflatable Mattress In Your Living Room?

Nope. Didn’t think so.

[Original graph source here. h/t Octo.]


Retro Johnson



Something looks familiar, and someone is not amused.


Breaking News: Charles Johnson Hasn’t Been Linked By Drudge Or Any Other Major Website In Years.

Nope. Charles Johnson’s Little Green Footballs hasn’t been linked by Drudge in decades, if ever, so we thought we’d help out CJ by messing with a Drudge Headline a bit. It’s a feel-good thang, and it’s all fake, just like Charles Johnson’s bonafides.

Rock on, Charles. Now update your 20 year-old avatar.


Charles Johnson’s Little Green Footballs Has Been Reduced From Posting Important Current Events and Breaking News to Music Vids and Links to Comics Who Think They Are The Reincarnation of Lenny Bruce When They’ve Never Heard Of Either Lenny Bruce Or Charles Johnson.

Exactly.

Charles Johnson’s Little Green Footballs blog is fading, and it’s fading in non-spectacular fashion. When was the last time he bragged about his “open sign-up” stats? You remember the “Door Is Open – Door Is Closed” taunting? When was the last time he posted something original, with links to prove it? Never. When was the last time Charles Johnson posted an honest-to-god current photo of himself while screeching at others for hiding behind avatars? Yeah, we heard your song long ago, Charles.

Everyone in the Blogosphere knows the answer to that one, and everyone in the Blogosphere doesn’t give a Johnson.


LGF is on the rebound. Or not.

Last time we checked Alexa Stats, things were not looking good for Little Green Footballs but something happened in mid-March, and it appeared that Charles Johnson was on the road to a comeback. Unfortunately, that comeback was short-lived, and by late April he was back on track. LGF bumped and slumped again.

Still not sure why Alexa skews the x-axis, but check this out.

Alexa says, “Not enough traffic data,” but 2% of LGF traffic came from searches for “Ivanka Trump Panama” and Dana Loesch‘s husband.” Creep city.

As Charles Johnson’s Little Green Footballs declines, so does this website. So where do we go from here? Leave your suggestions and we’ll have a vote.