Charles Johnson is Fakin’ the Bacon

$9,295 divided by 1,383 days = $6.71/day. Those anonymous donations are paying off like rabbits in a dark hutch.

Charles, you’re a hose rocker. Oh, and this:

209 Comments on “Charles Johnson is Fakin’ the Bacon”

  1. rightymouse says:

    Fatso…a legend in his own mind….

  2. windbag says:

    Happy President’s Day. Which President are you celebrating today?

    James Knox Polk. The most successful President in US history.

    • rightymouse says:

      Favorite President? Right now, it’s Trump!! ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Octopus says:

        Trump for the win. Washington is my close second.

      • windbag says:

        Yeah, but did Trump have his gallstones removed sans anesthesia or sterilization? At age 17?

        • rightymouse says:

          I don’t think so. But I dare say that they were both Democrats. Trump for less time than Polk, thank goodness. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • rightymouse says:

          That reminds me. John Adams’ daughter, Abigail Smith, had a breast removed without anesthesia according to wiki, although I do remember reading that she was given Laudanum (opium) for sedation.

          • Octopus says:

            Laudanum was strong medicine, and there were LOTS of addicts. The Opiate Crisis of the time.

          • rightymouse says:

            As a quick segue…I was given morphine before minor surgery in Bangkok when I was in my 20’s & working for the refugee office. All I can say is that I remember is not giving a crap what happened to me as I was being wheeled to surgery.

          • windbag says:

            A guy I knew had some serious health issues, and was in the hospital for months with about a 4″ hole in his gut, draining various nastinesses. He said that when he was first admitted, they gave him morphine, and that they could’ve cut his legs off and he wouldn’t have cared. Then he corrected himself and said, “Well, I would’ve cared, but I wouldn’t have felt it.”

          • Octopus says:

            One night when I was in college I was drinking with a buddy at his house, getting ready to hit the bars, and his older brother came over with a friend who looked sketchy as hell. They proceeded to search the house for a usable needle, could only find a dull one, and “fixed it” by sharpening it with sandpaper. Then they both shot up some heroin, right at the kitchen table in front of us. I thought the friend was going to die, as his eyes rolled up in his head and he nearly fell off the chair. He was okay, though — I mean, for a heroin addict. Within a few minutes they were both reclining on the couch in the next room, mumbling sweet nothings.

            I never had the urge to try the hard stuff after that experience.

          • Bunk X says:

            Eddie Poe was the first laudanum addict I ever read about.

            Although I had access to the heavy dope, I’d already been warned by some older guys who got off the stuff. Every one of them said the same thing: “Don’t even try it. You’ll like it too much.”

  3. Octopus says:

    This guy is awesome and deserves wider recognition. You may recall his being surrounded and physically threatened by that pack of Antifaggoos and the little screeching biyatch.

  4. Octopus says:

    Remember when S.E. Cupp was a thing, on the conservative side? Well, she parlayed her looks and NeverTrumpism into a CNN gig, and now she’s one of them. Gross. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • windbag says:

      I used to consider clicking on stuff with her name attached. Not any longer. She lost it awhile back. What is it with semi-reasonable people going bonkers and running to the left? Kirsten Powers was another one who flirted with sanity before diving into the Kool-Aid bucket.

    • rightymouse says:

      I have no clue what made her so much like Bill Kristol, George Will & a number of other turncoats. But I can’t read her stuff now. It’s puke-worthy. Even Erick Erickson has come around. And just look at our Lindsey Graham now!!

  5. Octopus says:

    “Long-awaited?” WTF? You used to post about the Moronic Convergence between the Left and Islamofascism for nearly a decade, before your mental breakdown in 2008. You need some pithy reminders from your own archives? Because we have them…somewhere around here. ๐Ÿ˜†

  6. Octopus says:

    Got one in moderation, or outer space. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

  7. rightymouse says:

    I bet they had a gay, I mean, swell time together. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • Octopus says:

      The Hodge Twins are a funny pair of brothers, I used to watch for their hilarious fitness and diet stuff on Youtube. They have gone into comedy full time now, touring across the country. They also happen to be young black conservatives. ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. Octopus says:

    Oooh, cultural appropriation for Chunky! Gettin’ all ghetto, up in this bitch. ๐Ÿ˜†

    Not a good look for you, Van-Stealer.

  9. Octopus says:

    It’s supposed to be satire, but it’s actually true. Does that make it…something else? Fake noose, perhaps?

  10. Octopus says:

    A very intriguing thread, from an unlikely source.

    • Bunk X says:

      According to the NAACP:

      From 1882-1968, 4,743 lynchings occurred in the United States. Of these people that were lynched 1,297 were white. The white people lynched accounted for 27.3% of all lynchings.

      California, Colorado, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Michigan, Minnesota, Montana, Nebraska, New Mexico, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Oregon, Utah, Washington, and Wyoming lynched more whites than blacks.

    • OldLineTexan says:

      Now have him figure out Covington.

      I need to know who’s allowed to be the victim in his world.

  11. Bunk X says:

    Meanwhile at the Socialist Deli:

  12. rightymouse says:

    What are the chances that Smollett had the nasty letters sent to himself?

    • Octopus says:

      About 100%, Iโ€™d say. I understand the police picked up a couple of magazines from the Nigerian brothersโ€™ place, with the implication being they cut the letters from them. I hope this goes to trial so we can enjoy the full discovery process.

  13. Octopus says:


    And yet nobody will give Chunky the time of day. Hey, Fatass…itโ€™s 12:10. Wake up!

  14. Octopus says:

    Yes, heโ€™s hilarious. SO much funnier than Seth Meyers! ๐Ÿ˜…

  15. Octopus says:

    No, theyโ€™re actually great. Fantastic. Too bad youโ€™re not invited to the party ๐ŸŽ‰! ๐Ÿ˜

  16. Octopus says:

    Gus hit the cot five hrs ago, with this exclamation. Dude, you need to get off this rollercoaster.

  17. Octopus says:

    Funny thread! Iโ€™ve had a few of these random misfires over the years. My kids like to bring them up and laff. ๐Ÿ˜Š

  18. rightymouse says:

    Bernie’s IN! ๐Ÿ˜† I need to make sure I have a good supply of popcorn for the Donkey primaries. ๐Ÿ˜†

  19. Octopus says:

    YES!! The more the merrier! Jump in, socialist Dems โ€” the waterโ€™s fine. ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜‚

    • rightymouse says:

      America tried what we call socialism early on in the Plymouth Colony. The colonists found out early on that it encouraged the slackers to do what they do best – suck on the gains of those willing to produce & they did nothing but create resentment in the productive. They got rid of the collectivism & went back to ‘each man for himself & family’. The rest is history.

      • Octopus says:

        The same exact thing happened on every hippie commune in the Sixties and beyond. A few people ended up doing all the work, while the moonchildren partied and screwed around. They all go bust in fairly short order.

  20. rightymouse says:

    Am laughing! Trump is brilliant! We know which countries/religion will have melt-downs & fuss in the media & then Western liberals will be forced to expose themselves as the hypocrites they really are.

  21. Chunky can't even says:

    Prepare to be shocked to your very core! Whoโ€™s really behind the Green New Deal?

    Does it rhyme with morose?

  22. Chunky can't even says:

    I finally figured out how to get a comment to appear after it disappears. Post it three times!!! Unfortunately all disappeared comments suddenly show up at once.

    • Chunky can't even says:

      Unfortunately it’s not funny when you post it three times. Seems kind of desperate. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

      • rightymouse says:

        I’m not having these problems. Maybe you, Octo, Beed & Bunk can compare notes???

        • Chunky can't even says:

          It’s no big deal. I just take it very personally. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • Bunk X says:

          No idea what’s going on. Nothing has changed on the Dashboard, nothing in the Spaminator folder, nothing blocked, and no one else seems to be having troubles.

          This place runs an older version of WordPress that may not recognize some newer email extensions. I’m just guessing.

          I saw nothing clogged up in the Spaminator’s lunchbox that didn’t look like spam.

          • Octopus says:

            Another website I comment on occasionally had the same thing, where my login info was erased after every post. I think it must have had something to do with a recent auto-update to Windows 10. Maybe they’ll fix it? Is that too much to hope for?

          • Bunk X says:

            Windows 10 did a lot of weird things when I was forced to switch over from NT. Eventually it got its shit together and stopped messing with my settings.

  23. Chunky can't even says:

    Heh heh. Very cool. I would imagine a $250 mil judgement against the Wash Bleep would bankrupt them. But since they’re owned by Bezos flush with Amazon billions he just might help them pay it out and then refund them out of his pocket so he can keep his Trump bashing fake news mouthpiece.

    Poor Chunky. All his favorite hoaxers are going down. Smollett, Muellers Nothingburger Russian Collusion, no one believes Climate Hoax anymore (and is sick of it), AOC turns out to be just an idiot and so many others. Cheer up Chunk. You’re still CEO of your very own internet begging website!

  24. Chunky canโ€™t even says:

    Here you go Chunk. To go with your fakinโ€™ bacon. Unctuous oeufs! ๐Ÿค“

  25. Chunky canโ€™t even says:

  26. Octopus says:

    There is absolutely no hyperbole in this fine VDH piece. They tried to take Trump down, and so far they have failed gloriously. ๐Ÿ˜†

  27. Octopus says:

    Do something nice for someone today. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • rightymouse says:

      I made coffee for my boss. ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Octopus says:

        That was very nice. I trust you went light on the arsenic today?

        Iโ€™m still looking for my opportunity to bank some good karma. I was planning on cleaning off the fresh snow from my co-workersโ€™ cars, but now there might not be any until tonight.

      • rightymouse says:

        My real boss is 98 years old and is in Florida for the winter. My other boss is 92 years old and I went easy on the arsenic because we actually had to work this morning. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Bunk X says:

      I showed a draftsman how to draw a stair section, for the 3rd time, without castigating him.

  28. rightymouse says:

    The Smollett case gets stinkier. The Nigerian bros say he DID send the nasty letter to himself & the Cook County DA recuses herself. Oof! ๐Ÿ˜†

  29. Octopus says:

    The Life-Cycle Of The Daily Chunky Scoop. ๐Ÿ˜‚

  30. Chunky can't even says:

    Idiotic Californicating libtards have royally pissed off the President by leading the charge to sue him over wall funding. Then casually announce that they blew/wasted $2.5 billion in Federal grant money on a high speed rail project that will never get built. Comically this was supposed to be Jerry Brown’s “legacy” LOL!

    Now Trump’s making it clear he’s looking to claw back the lost $2.5 bil and “intends to” block another close to $1 bil they still had coming.

    No wonder Chunky wanted to join them so bad. He’s a natural at blind hatred and self-thwarting vindictiveness. He’s the guy who goes all scorched Earth except ends up only burning down his own house while everyone stands around laughing at him.

  31. Octopus says:

    Makes perfect sense to me. ๐Ÿง

  32. rightymouse says:

    And so it has begun as predicted. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • Octopus says:

      That’s such a stupid hawt take I don’t think I can deal with it. It’s not productive to argue with insane people, or extremely drunk people, or people on really hard drugs, or all of these issues at once. I think that’s what we’re up against here. ๐Ÿ˜†

      • Bunk X says:

        Some claim that I’m in one or more of those groups. Argue with me. If I can’t handle it, I’ll summon ISTE and Beed for backup.

        • Octopus says:

          I think you only take a little heroin, on weekends. Balanced with just the right amount of cocaine, for the perfect speedball. What could go wrong, said John Belushi. Anyway, I’d like to try some heroin, but not until I’m diagnosed with terminal something. Then I’m going HAM!!1! ๐Ÿ˜†

  33. dezzez says:

    Maybe half-witted predictions of from pathetic losers on a daily basis about how the Mueller investigation was gonna bring Trump down came into play?
    And if there is so many reasons to impeach Trump, why are your precious democrats covering for him….Chuck?

    • dezzez says:

    • Bunk X says:

      And the back-pedaling continues. There’s nothing in the report except for the parts that are redacted that prove without a doubt that Trump made a deal with Putin to make sure that Hillary didn’t get elected.

  34. dezzez says:

    • Bunk X says:

      The story is great. The commentary is moronic.

      • Octopus says:

        If only he’d had time to brand the thief. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • Bunk X says:

          The iron on his ass should read “FKN A.”

          • Octopus says:

            The brothers in a black frat at UM used to brand new inductees, resulting in hideous scar-tissue renderings of the Greek letters. Blacks get this growing scar-tissue thing, called keloids I believe — later, the members of this frat would compare their hideous scars and chuckle about their wayward youthful silliness. Okay, that’s not racist, it’s just young idiots being idiots. ๐Ÿ˜†

  35. Octopus says:

    Maybe itโ€™s just inevitable herd-thinning behavior. Nothing seems to stop junkies from doing junk, besides death or some kind of personal miracle.

  36. ISTE says:

    TSA conducting a random prostate check on an airline passenger.

    He passed.

    • Octopus says:

      That part of the drinking cycle when you’re crying goes nicely with a cop’s knee in your back, putting the cuffs on good and tight. ๐Ÿ˜†

      Gus says, “We’ve all been there, right?”

    • rightymouse says:

      This is insane!! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

  37. Octopus says:

    Not fair. Break his thumbs, boys. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • rightymouse says:

      He’s good! ๐Ÿ˜†

      • Octopus says:

        He’s a killer, that guy. I used to play a lot of gnip-gnop back in HS and college, as my HS friends and I had access to basement tables we’d incorporate into party activities, and just goofing around in general. When I lived in a dorm in my first year of college, I used to play just about every day or night in the social area — I was a contender. Never the best player, but always a threat. The best player that year was an ex-seminarian who flunked out of seminary school because he wanted to have the intercourse with the pretty ladies, and had worked out a lot of frustration on the table while pursuing that relationship with the Catholic Church. He was awesome.

        • rightymouse says:

          I learned to play at a young age & was a very good player. Formidable, in fact. Then I had a stroke in 2009 that took out fine motor in my right side/hand. Coordination is not my strength now, even after therapy. But I can write again (sort of) & use a keyboard.

        • rightymouse says:

          What grip do you use? I used the penhold grip.

          • Octopus says:

            I think you would have whipped me but good. That’s the same grip the Chinese guys use — I tried to learn it, but I was too old to re-learn my whole game.

            I was good at making diving saves on run-of-the-mill college dorm players, though. I was also pretty good at switching hands under extreme pressure. I wonder if I could recapture any of the old magic, at my extremely advanced age. My vision is still good. Reflexes, I don’t know…seem okay. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  38. rightymouse says:

    This cartoonist is good too! ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Octopus says:

      ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜†

      They cut him off the show entirely, I see. Oh, shit — that’s some bad contract negotiatin’!

  39. rightymouse says:

    ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜†

    • rightymouse says:

      The left are too busy having continual melt-downs over their loss in 2016. They’ll be even more inconsolable after the 2020 election.

  40. rightymouse says:

    So glad you ‘get’ it, Gussy!

  41. Bunk X says:

    I love this song after three beers, so It’s for Calo.

  42. Bunk X says:

    Okay, I’ll stop, but this is awesome.

    • rightymouse says:

      Just listened to this and it made me want to go back to bed for a nap. Lovely! ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Bunk X says:

        I’d half a beer when I posted those.

        • Bunk X says:

          …as if y’all couldn’t tell.

          • Octopus says:

            Can you tell I’ve had six beers tonight? And I’m starting to waver? ๐Ÿ˜†

            My younger gal broke up with her boyfriend last night, and she’s a wreck. She’ll find a new guy within a month or two, but for now, it’s total disaster. She gets so down on herself, when it’s always the fact she’s young and dating guys who are immature a-holes, not ready for a grown-up relationship when she is. I wish she would just stop trying to find the missing puzzle-piece for awhile, and focus on herself and her career, which are going just fine. These boys are useless, except in terms of “what you don’t want or need.” I know, as I was one myself. ๐Ÿ˜†

          • rightymouse says:

            I’m so sorry, Octo. But it’s better that things work themselves out before marriage & kids. Your daughter will be fine.
            As I’ve confided before here, my step-daughter married a guy we couldn’t stand. When their first child was born, she caught him effing one of her girlfriends. Then, when they were stationed in Thailand (he was in the Air Force), another one of her girlfriends came to visit & he was caught boffing her! Her choices of girlfriends are suspect as well, and we have admonished her, but they are now divorced. Thank Gaia!!

          • Bunk X says:

            No, because we’re all on the same plane of conscienceless. Phttt.

  43. rightymouse says:

    S&M man at Walmart! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ

    • Octopus says:

      Heheh…GMTA. Been out shopping for crap today. ๐Ÿ’ฉ

    • rightymouse says:

      The whiners are out at Dailymail over the Feinstein story. ๐Ÿ˜†
      In case you haven’t seen it, I asked ^^^ what grip you use in ping-pong. ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Octo says:

        I used the โ€œshake handsโ€ grip, as taught by my older brother. I saw people using various grips that I never understood, probably including the pen hold grip. I wish we still had a table, now โ€” we gave it away during one of my wifeโ€™s anti-hoarding jags. ๐Ÿ˜‰

        • rightymouse says:

          I loved the penhold grip. Could put a vicious spin on the ball. ๐Ÿ™‚
          We left our table at the old house when we moved to our new place in 2003. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

  44. rightymouse says:

    Of course you love the New Green Deal, Fatso! Because you’re a vapid leftist ideologue who is stuck on stupid.

  45. rightymouse says:

    It’s all over the news now, lefties. Klobuchar is toast. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • Octopus says:

      He used the party drug, molly. Not exactly heroin, crack or meth. I think he’s just trying to mitigate his sentencing, with a plea for lenience based on victim-status. Now why would I think such a guy would be hooked on victim-status? So racist of me. ๐Ÿ˜†

      • rightymouse says:

        I watched his interview with Robin Roberts where he faked crying and said “It feels like if I had said it was a Muslim, or a Mexican, or someone black, I feel like the doubters wouldโ€™ve supported me a lot more, and that says a lot about the place that we are in our country right now,โ€ He lied. Flat out lied. He’ll use drug addiction to weasel his sorry ass out of jail.

        • Octopus says:

          I just watched the interview — his eyes are looking down and to the left and right all over the place, a sure sign of a person making it up as he goes along. Lying POS! ๐Ÿ˜†

  46. Bunk X says:

  47. Octopus says:

    I go back and forth on Joe Rogan, but I usually find his clips entertaining. I just came across this one, which was done before the arrest and charging of the idiot Smollett. You get a glimpse of the Hollywood mindset, where any publicity is good publicity, unless it crosses the ever-shifting line and becomes Really Bad Publicity. Still not sure if Smollett’s case will turn out career-ending, but it’s leaning in that direction. Like the idea of a Hate Crime Hoax show. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Octopus says:

      This is just awful. Sexist and filthy stuff. Not safe! If you laff at all, you’re a very bad person. I didn’t laff, just reported him to the Youtube Authority On Taste.

  48. ISTE says:

    Well, I now have no job. Was let go as “no longer required” last week.

    I am OK with that, but I was not paid for the time owed to me either. $2400.

    However I updated my profile on Linkedin to reflect my job duties for the company that no longer required my services.

    Looks like they are going to need to employ five or six people and a cat to replace me ( cat was pest control, I took Princess Natasha to work a few times and the mice problem was no more. She is a good pest control cat )

    My ex job…

    Office manager
    Supervisor (one other employee)
    Through hole PCB assembly
    SMD PCB assembly by hand
    Testing and repair of circuit boards
    Shipping UPS and FedEx
    Sales support
    Quality control
    New product development
    In house pest control operative ( LOL Natasha )
    Janitorial services ( i.e. cleaning the toilet and mopping floors )

    Anything else that was required to keep the company viable

    • Octopus says:

      You have skills. Get out of that wasteland of failed businesses, and apply for work at a going concern. Get your cat a license as a certified “comfort animal,” or whatever they call them. You can still take her to work and on planes, and she can’t be denied access to apartments or any rental properties — she’s now “medicine.” And I think she’s good medicine.

      • ISTE says:

        I will. I am currently feeling lower than whale shit with no job and no income.

        No income is not a problem. No job is.

        Why get out of bed?

        • Octopus says:

          Don’t let the bastards get you down, old man. Get up early and go for a long walk, talking to people along the way. I know people who have found work that way, out of nowhere. Look for a job in the Sunday classifieds, too.

          The economy’s humming, and there are jobs out there. Don’t limit yourself to things you’ve done in the past. Try something new. Everywhere I go, I see signs looking for school bus drivers — do you have a driver’s license? Are you not wanted for pedo-crimes? You’re hired! I mean, that’s just an example, but I know there are lots of businesses looking for decent employees.

    • rightymouse says:

      Sorry to hear this, ISTE! It happened once to me years ago when I lived in California, and I remember the disorientation. Best thing to do is get out there and start looking for a new job. Perhaps at a company that’s bigger/more successful?

  49. Octopus says:

    Nils Lofgren was a l’il rockstar who never really made it big, but he had the talent. Wrote a bunch of good rock tunes, and could play guitar better than most of his peers. I saw him in Ypsilanti in 1980, at a small venue off of Michigan Ave. He had one of those little trampolines set up on the stage, and did some flips off of it during his solos. Later, I saw him with Springsteen’s E Street Band, filling in for Miami Steve Van Zandt who was trying to get his own solo career off the ground, to no avail. He tore it up on guitar with Springsteen. Anti-Springsteen People, I know — he’s a no-good apparatchik. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • Octopus says:

      Nils wrote this song to Keith Richards back when everyone thought Richards was about to kill himself with heroin. Well, turns out Keith is immortal, and nothing can kill him. He’ll prolly outlive Nils, and me for that matter.

      This is a beautiful piece of acoustic guitar pickin’, with the most gorgeous stuff happening after the three-minute mark.

    • Abu penis penis penis says:

      You rang?๐Ÿ™‰

  50. Octopus says:

    The Socialist Nightmare is already here. Keep throwing more money at the bums, instead of encouraging them to move along. It’s working a treat, as they say. ๐Ÿ˜†

  51. Octopus says:

    The last time we had one of these “wind bombs” or whatever they call them now, we had a 30-foot pine blow over onto our garage. Luckily, damage was minor. Hope the power doesn’t go out — it’s been flickering, and we haven’t even had the worst wind yet. ๐Ÿ˜ฏ


    High Wind Warning for Oakland County, Michigan
    Until 4:00am EST, Mon Feb 25

    Action Recommended: Make preparations per the instructions
    Issued by: Detroit – MI, US, National Weather Service,

    • rightymouse says:

      Dammit! Michigan’s winds are pounding NE Ohio!
      We had brunch in Chagrin Falls this morning & the lights went out twice in the restaurant. When we left, the street lights on Main Street were out. We’re home now and the 50 degrees mild weather we woke to this morning is now 49 degrees but cloudy & very, very windy. We also had some hail as we came down the driveway.

  52. Octopus says:

    “hit job” ๐Ÿ˜†

    Oh, Fatass. You slay every time.

    • OldLineTexan says:

      We don’t make the rules, we just play by them.

      Feinstein’s Party will now have to drink from the very well they poisoned.

      I shall laugh.

      It’s not a “hit job”, you schlub … it’s an own goal.

  53. rightymouse says:

    Our power went kaplooey and we went out to get something to eat. Lots of places closed due to the power outage. Found a rib joint on a generator. Got home & power is back on. YAYYY!