Happy Columbus Day! Charles Johnson’s Magical Jazzy Ponytail rocks the internet.

LGF sycophant HappyWarrior thinks that The Natives were a volcanic island nation somewhere east of Culver City and west of St. Louis that was conquered by Mennonites in 1923 during the pre-Cambrian Period. But we’re not here to pick on ignoramuses like HappyWarrior because

OH WAIT… That’s exactly why we’re here.

Charles, define a “Native American.” Isn’t it someone like you who was born (or whelped) here?

Okay, try this. What is an “Indigenous American?” A potato? A chile? Tobacco? A hot tomato? Mountain Dew? If we limit the definition to humans, there’s still no *ahem* consensus on which group of uncivilized murderous pagan barbaric tribes showed up first. According to modern anthropology and forensics, the first humans to settle in the Americas likely didn’t come from Mongolia over the frozen Bering Strait, but from somewhere far southwest of Culver City.

Once corrected on his ignorance, Johnson attacks and dismisses the polite woman  as “pedantic.” Charles, you’re not the brightest bulb in the garlic patch. By your own definition, you’re a typical European white supremacist fascist who spent his entire life co-opting the contributions of other ethnic cultures, but at the very least you can listen to this.

Mark Levin did some simple research (that Johnson didn’t bother with) and came up with this amazing concise monologue:

Charles, PLEASE call into Levin’s radio show and display your superior Magical Jazzy Ponytail intellect to the world.

We’ll buy you a parakeet. Promise.

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