Yep, it’s time for a vote.

Charles Foster Johnson, UberMensch of the Internet, has provided us with much fodder for mockery for a long time now, and now the question is: Where do we go from here?

Do we continue to tear apart his Twitter feed one post at a time? Do we mock his Magical Jazzy Ponytail until it calcifies and breaks off into a punchbowl and poisons toddlers in Inglewood? Do we walk away from the Culver City Big Boy forever and become a recipe blog?

Nah. As long as we’re around, Charles will be arounder. We’re all about making mirth of his girth, his lack of mental depth, and his apparent ignorance of his own shortcomings as he touts his own version of reality. Rock on me bloogs.

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129 Comments on “Yep, it’s time for a vote.”

  1. Octopus says:

    Is it too much to ask for, that they share a cell together? A small cell. I know it would be tight, but maybe Rosie could lose weight in jail.

    REALITY WINNER
    WANTED TO ‘BURN THE WHITE HOUSE DOWN’
    … Prosecutors Say

    6/8/2017 5:19 PM PDT

    BREAKING NEWS
    Accused NSA leaker Reality Winner wrote about Osama bin Laden, al Qaeda and torching the White House … according to prosecutors.
    Winner entered a not guilty plea Thursday to one count of “willful retention and transmission of national defense information.” During the hearing, prosecutors said 2 notebooks were found in Winner’s home, and in one of them she’d written … “I want to burn the White House down.”
    On other pages she’d listed names of Taliban and al Qaeda leaders, bin Laden … according to prosecutors. 25-year-old Winner is accused of leaking at least one classified NSA document to a media outlet.
    Winner’s parents were in court and testified to her character. It didn’t work. She was denied bail and led back to jail in shackles.

    • rightymouse says:

      This GoFundMe has raked in over 20K from suckers. Fatso is definitely doing something wrong. 😆

      • OLT's Stuck in Irak says:

        Does she have enough to be transformed into a male yet?

        Isn’t that what we do in these cases now? Change your junk and set you loose?

    • Trump is Teh HORROR!- Chunky McDumbth, #1Olberdouche Fan Boy. says:

      The Top Secret Security vetting process.

    • ISTE says:

      I would like to share a jail cell with her!

      She is my ideal woman. Blonde, blue eyed and batshit crazy.

      Unfortunately Calo only scores one out of three. 😦

      (Not saying which one)

    • Bunk X says:

      Even women can sport a mullet.

  2. Octopus says:

    If we stopped covering Chunky’s hijinx, who would be around to chronicle his Final Meltdown? You know, the one where he is removed from the bunker by crane and transported to the Fat Hospital by a semi-trailer, strapped down and gibbering?

    I think we owe it to him, for all the years of entertainment. Both before and after his Moronic Conversion.

    • rightymouse says:

      AMEN!!!! 😆

    • ISTE says:

      LOL.. Wondering how we can make a video parody of Europa Final Countdown.

      I may have some free time soon. (Fucking unemployed again maybe, but this time not my fault so I can claim unemployment and welfare. I will be a leech and parasite and a burden on society. )

      • Bunk X says:

        Cool. You take over the watch, because I’m fucking employed again.

        • ISTE says:

          Glad you are employed, seriously. I have no family, no kids no responsibility and no life. Employment just interrupts my wild, carefree and exotic lifestyle. *burp* Oh employment allows me to buy beer….

          So, I have a project!!!!!!!!

          Some reason to live again. LOL

          • Bunk X says:

            On the other hand, I’m sitting in the kitchen listening to LaLaLand emanating from the living room and it makes me wanna puke. It’s me and the beer, and the beer is getting annoyed, too.

  3. Octopus says:

    Another way of conceptualizing what happened to the Trump-Russia Election Collusion Kerfuffle yesterday. Just trying to help the libturds, who are really having a struggle trying to comprehend the matter. I mean, look at Fatass, hours after the testimony of Ratface ruined the party:

    2/2 tweets from people named “Deplorable,” all reciting the same bullshit.
    8 hours ago
    1/2 I can always tell when some right wing spokeshole has issued a talking point for the Parrot Squad, because I suddenly get dozens of …
    8 hours ago
    @mldemmons Absolutely true, and many of them are still trying to shift the blame for Trump to liberals because they… twitter.com/i/web/status/8…
    8 hours ago

    Massive stinging butthurt, and bitter clinging to yet another failed narrative. The Streak!!! 😆

  4. Octopus says:

    The mind reels at what Islam has wrought in the Mideast. 😯

  5. Octopus says:

    The curtain call came fast and messily last night:

    Horns.
    5 hours ago
    Squints.
    5 hours ago
    Fuck.
    5 hours ago
    Nooooooooooooooo!
    5 hours ago
    La dueña.
    5 hours ago
    Y para ti!
    5 hours ago
    Wasn’t the same dummies.
    5 hours ago
    Oh shit.
    5 hours ago

  6. Octopus says:

    Nothing will ever top Election Night 2016, but this portrait of NY hipster-douches gathering to watch the Comey hearing yesterday comes close. You know there are at least a couple of conservative plants in the room, boiling tea in their navels and trying to hide massive schadenboners. Maybe even a moonbat or two to get disgusted by the total collapse of the narrative, and inspired to start pulling threads from the narrative they’ve been spoon-fed, and then the whole sordid tapestry collapses and they get smart before it’s too late. Hey, a kid can dream. 😆

    http://ijr.com/the-declaration/2017/06/894646-accounts-brooklyn-hipsters-bar-watching-comey-hearing-hilarious/

    Just look at this masterpiece:

    😆 😆 😆 😆

    • Pakimon says:

      Those hipster douches look like they’re sitting through Pee Wee Herman’s basement meeting.

      Actually, Pee Wee Herman’s basement meeting is a pretty good analogy for this whole Comey testimony nothingburger. 😆 😆

  7. rightymouse says:

    I vote we stay! 😆

  8. rightymouse says:

    Can you say ‘sour grapes’??? 😆

    • dezes157 says:

      What a shame Trump won’t visit Little Green Footballs for Chucks hate filled hyperbole, his deep seated paranoia and sheer stupidity.
      The brilliant ways Chuck says go fuck yourself when corrected, I look forward to his every syllable with heart stopping anticipation, the man is Shakespeare with a frontal lobotomy.
      Chuck, we both know you never bought a shotgun named Mossberg, Shame too, you could have used it to do the world a favor.

    • Bunk X says:

  9. Octopus says:

    😆

    So much butthurt.

    • Octopus says:

      That was a Chunky retweet, btw. Grasping at straws and stale Cheetos, while swigging warm pee. 😆

    • OLT's Stuck in Irak says:

      Oh, that timeline is all butthurt and “NOW WE GOT HIM!”

      It’s comical.

      You guys hated Comey not that long ago. You’re fucking pathetic.

  10. Abu penis penis penis lol says:

    I don’t want to live in a world without DoD.
    pannus pannus pannus lol

    • Bunk X says:

      Possum just talked me off of the ledge.

      • Octopus says:

        You know how many times I’ve thought about quitting this watch? At least once a week. Then something happens that pulls me back in…something hilarious, usually. Plus, I like you guys. There, I said it. 🙂

        • Abu penis penis penis lol says:

          Don’t get all squishy on us, dude, lol.
          Truth is I enjoy reading you, rightymouse, OLT, bunk x, ISTE, and those who change their names so often I only recognize the agitated.
          Paki and trebob, too. And archane.(sorry about spelling?)

        • Bunk X says:

          Like Billy Joel once sang, “It’s All Penis LOL To Me.”

  11. dezes157 says:

    Chuck massive ass is stinging now, Months of screeching about Trump being investigated just blew up in his fat face.
    So whats a raving loon to do for blog hits, post weeks old stories stolen from others.
    Chuck is parasite, a bulging fat tick on Hillary Clinton’s leathery ass.

  12. irongrampa says:

    Can’t help but reflect now and then at what a decent gathering place that was, with a plethora of smart people.

    I lurked for a number of years before getting up the nerve to post.

    After my banning, seeing the legion of the banned and subsequently seeing many of the names in various sites it’s evident there was a pretty big group that once inhabited the place.

    And he threw it away.

    • rightymouse says:

      He could have become wealthy like Breitbart did before his death or eventually sell LGF like Arianna Huffington did with the Huffington Post. I bet even Kos makes more than he does even though we don’t hear much from him these days. But he thought he could ride the Obama wave to financial heaven by getting rid of his posters. What a dumbass. 😆

      • Bunk X says:

        He could have quietly spun off a sister blog and let it compete with LGF, but he didn’t. Instead he destroyed and alienated his base thinking that Huffpo was where the big bucks were. He forgot that he’d disparaged that base for about 10 years, but too many others remember.

    • Octopus says:

      Wow! First they dump Kathy Griffin, and now this turd. Who’s next on the chopping block?

  13. rightymouse says:

    Hey! Fatso! You’re a disgusting hater of Christians and your/our POTUS. Blech.

  14. Octopus says:

    How on Erf do the other perfessors keep straight faces while listening to this beast of a bitch rant and rave? Boy, do I wish I had more kids who hadn’t been to college yet, so I could send them to Evergreen Academy For Deranged People. 😆

    • Minnowredux says:

      This bitch has never accomplished anything meaningful in her life. Listen to her.

      What a moron.

      This is the result of political correctness, diversity and affirmative action.

      What a skank. She should be fired.

    • Dwells38 says:

      What is that?

      • dudebro says:

        chuckles soulmate. They can burp and fart together while they watch Ron Reagan jr’s older brother Rachel on MSNBC

    • dezes157 says:

      Did a cow shit on her head?

      • Octopus says:

        She appears to be constructed entirely out of bullshit. Have you seen her resume?

        Also, answer the fucking questions, you white devils!

        http://www.naimalowe.net/39uestions/
        (I haven’t seen anything this schtooped pretending to be art since somebody mistook a pile of swept-up dirt at the Met for an “installation.” 😆

        Naima Lowe
        naimalowe@gmail.com
        http://www.naimalowe.com
        Education
        Temple University, MFA Film and Media, 2008
        Brown University, BA Africana Studies, 2002

        Fellowships and Awards
        Sponsored Research Grant, The Evergreen State College 2015
        Faculty Foundation Grant, The Evergreen State College 2014
        Sponsored Research Grant, The Evergreen State College 2011
        Paul Robeson Award for Best Experimental Film, Newark Black Film Festival 2008
        Regional Finalist-Alternative Category, 35th Student Academy Awards 2008
        Project Completion Grant, Philadelphia Independent Film and Video Association 2007
        Winner- Best Sound Design, NextFrame International Student Film Festival 2007
        Beatrice Deglin Leder Film and Video Production Award Temple University 2006
        Future Faculty Fellowship, Temple University 2005
        C.V. Starr Community Service Fellowship, Brown University 2002
        Leadership Alliance Theater Research Fellowship, University of Dar Es Salaam 2000
        Mellon Mays Undergraduate Fellowship, Brown University 1999
        Professional Teaching Experience
        Member of the Faculty – The Evergreen State College 2010-Present
        “Art, New Media and the Science of Perception; Collaborative Autobiographics” 2010-11
        “Mediaworks; Projects in Experimental Media and Music” 2011-12
        “Video in/and Performance Art” 2012-13
        “Electronic Media Intern Program” 2011-13
        “Creating Dangerously: Experiments in Feminist and Diaspora Art” 2013-14
        Faculty – Goddard College, Individualized Studies 2009-2010
        Faculty Advisor with focus in Film, Video, Performance, Cultural Studies
        Adjunct Faculty – Temple University, Gen Ed and Film and Media Arts 2007-2010
        Courses: “The History of Race and Ethnicity in Cinema” 2009
        “Video Production Workshop” 2008-2010
        “Media and Culture: Introduction to Media Theory and Media Studies” 2008
        “Introduction to Film and Video” 2007-2008

        Senior Lecturer – University of the Arts, Program in Communication 2008
        “Cinema Arts” Introduction to Film and Video Analysis, 24 Students, Lecture and Discussion
        Teaching/Research Assistant – Temple University, Film and Media Arts 2006-2007
        Courses: “The History of Race and Ethnicity in Cinema” 2008
        “Video Production Workshop” 2007
        “Introduction to Film and Video Analysis” 2006
        “Narrative Film History” 2006

  15. Minnowredux says:

    Hey Charles, perhaps you would like to comment on Reza Aslan and his recent demise for being such a fucking shithead?

    No.

    No, Charles. You would rather assert your “he-beastedness” and refer to the duly elected President of the United States of America in third grade terms.

    Charles, you are an absolute piece of shit.

  16. ISTE says:

    Me and my big stupid mouth.

    This is the raw material I am going to be working with. Two problems.

    I have to alter the vocal track so “countdown” is “meltdown”

    And on the visuals…

    We need to insert some orange overall clad noodler in place of the guitar solo bits.

    Let me think about this. I need to acquire new skills.

    Audio… easiest would be to use a midi soundtrack and sing it myself with altered lyrics. While drunk.

    YEP a plan!!!!!!

    So first, I buy beer…

    • ISTE says:

      OK, going to use this MIDI audio. No vocals. Subtitles like the hitler downfall parody ones.

      Yeah! The final meltdown! Video needs trigglypuf too.

      • Octopus says:

        Looking forward to the finished product, ISTE. I would pitch in some homebrew beer (very strong) if you were nearby. 🙂

    • Octopus says:

      Is there a football game starting?! 🙂

      Amurican football, limey. Not your sissified “futbol.” Pronounced, “fut-bol.” 😆

  17. Octopus says:

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!1!

    He just can’t let this particular myth go, folks. As hills go on the Libturd Front, I guess it’s as good a one as any to die upon.

    • Pakimon says:

      How exactly did Russia interfere with our presidential election.

      Funny how nobody can answer that simple question.

      Just inane blather about “Russian hackers doing er, uh, ummm… well they must’ve did somethin’ !!!!!111!!!” 😆

      • Trump is Teh HORROR!- Chunky McDumbth, #1Olberdouche Fan Boy. says:

        I heard a demoncrap rep try to explain that it was Russian “media trolls” on Tucker Carlson. When Tucker pressed him for what he would do about them he gave no coherent answer and could only go back robotically to the seriousness of Russian interference blah blah until Tucker just started laughing at him. Just like climate change the hardcore left don’t believe the Russian collusion themselves. It’s only a talking point to be distributed to the dim-witted minions and useful idjits like Chunk0 J0hns0n. Except Chunk0 is more useless than useful as far as idjits go.

  18. Octopus says:

    😆

    Chunky is VERY concerned about helping the poor, now that he is poor.

  19. Octopus says:

    Gus had a beatific moment of patriotic fervor last night, before he lapsed into a coma. That’s a first.

    Boom.
    5 hours ago
    Man.
    5 hours ago
    Damn.
    5 hours ago
    Oh shit!
    5 hours ago
    Of thee I sing.
    5 hours ago
    So beautiful. Yes.
    5 hours ago
    So beautiful.
    5 hours ago
    Amazing grace.
    5 hours ago
    What a beautiful moment.
    5 hours ago
    Praise be God.
    5 hours ago

  20. Pakimon says:

    Das a beautiful Saturday morning in Mother Russia and Pakimogski say it time to take break from hacking elections and blog of corpulent ponytailed govniuk and go for a swim russian style with spry and sturdy russian girl! 😀

    • rightymouse says:

      This guy ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And he’s hairy & he’s wearing a speedo. 😆

      • Octopus says:

        I like that song, too. Pure pop. Timberlake understands the genre.

        This guy needs to continue the cardio, and mix in a salad now and again. Dressing on the side. Of the pool.

          • Octopus says:

            I found myself on a bus full of kids and parents on the way to a happenin’ field trip, and this song came on. The kids all knew it from the movie (whatever the movie is) and the parents (well, the moms mostly) got down and danced, too. I almost danced, myself. It’s just a feel-good tune. If you h8 it, you a h8tr.

    • Octopus says:

      Not even a hint of stubble! You can tell that icy bath is great for the skin, too. So smooth. 🙂

  21. rightymouse says:

    The next 4 years will be a laff-riot for us while we document your insanity. 😆

  22. Pakimon says:

    I guess Trump monsters have replaced the nazi creationists lurking under Chunkles’ futon. 😆

  23. Trump is Teh HORROR!- Chunky McDumbth, #1Olberdouche Fan Boy. says:

    The Strange Origins of the GOP Ideology That Rejects Caring for the Poor lgf.bz/2slvDdO https://t.co/QBkjdGUf8M
    12 hours ago

    So let me get this straight. Progressives are totally against any religion in government. Except they suddenly point to the teachings of Jesus as a reason to fleece the productive tax payers of their hard earned money. Money which ostensibly is for destitute strangers with all kinds of fucked up problems completely beyond my control. But really mostly goes to bloated government bureaucracy, prog cronies, fake libturd boondoggles, corrupt pols, moronic waste and able bodied frauds. Very little actually gets to the poor kids because it has to go through their drug addicted parent first (usually just one). Much bad behavior is rewarded and a cycle of cynical abuse of the system has been in place for many generations now. Would Jesus really view the current welfare state as “caring for the poor” in any way? And do progs give a shit about souls as Jesus did? Would Jesus even approve of automatic pay deductions going to unknown persons of unknown character to be spent in unknown ways?

    Anyway how rich is it for the most hateful, vindictive, self-important, prideful, judgemental and unforgiving prick on the internet to be lecturing on the teachings of Christ? A man who begs for money but only on the internet because he’s too lazy and fancies himself too clever to do it in person.

  24. rightymouse says:

    A Gussy retweet…

  25. Octopus says:

    I have to admit, I enjoyed Bill Maher being dragged through the mud here. Not that he doesn’t have some good lines about the Left and Islam on occasion, but it’s fun to watch Libturds get hoist on they own petards. 😆

    • Bunk X says:

      I got about halfway through, to the point where Symone claims that slaves were beaten day in and day out. That’s a lie.

      • Octopus says:

        Yes, because the beatings were interspersed with rape, not to mention their daily duties of tending to the children and bringing tea to the lazy white folk, who were lounging around fanning themselves and talking about secession. Symone’s got a great grasp of antebellum history.

        The horrors of slavery are well-documented, but the idea that it all happened yesterday, or is still happening today, is where I get off the bandwagon. This nation fought one of the bloodiest wars of all time over the issue, and guess which side won? Most white Americans today were still slaving away themselves in Europe, eking out an existence before finally fleeing for the Land Of Opportunity, crossing the ocean with our wives on our backs, etc.

        • Octopus says:

          *ancestors, of course

        • Bunk X says:

          The south was dirt poor, and only about 10% could even afford a slave. If you could only afford a mule, or maybe a horse, would you mistreat it?
          The War of Secession had more to do with economics, than slavery. Lincoln and others wanted to free the slaves for the sake of humanity, but the Union wouldn’t re-compensate the slave owners for their investments.

  26. Octopus says:

    http://www.weeklystandard.com/violent-portland/article/2008405

    I’m seriously starting to re-think the visit to Portland this summer. I hate to be a travel-pussy, but I might say or do something unintentionally that sets off the Portlandia Riots.

    • dudebro says:

      Don’t feel like a pussy, it’s a liberal shithole, why waste your money there?

      • Octopus says:

        Point taken. We’re visiting friends who are not shitlibs, so there’s a chance we could just enjoy the scenery and have a few laffs. Our old pal “Because” lives there, too.

  27. rightymouse says:

    Gussy has a sad. 😆

  28. rightymouse says:

    Hubby is conducting tonight so I have to get dressed in my sparklies. Later!! 🙂

  29. ISTE says:

    This place is a community. Granted it is a small one and the topic that first attracted members to post here was to laugh at Charles Johnson. However it has evolved into a meeting place for like minded individuals that can share links, experiences and soft core porn (on Saturdays) music videos and general day to day stuff.

    I think all we really need is a new thread every day when the current one slows down due to the size of it.

    Does not really matter what the topic of the thread is, nobody sticks to it.

    As an example if you started a thread detailing Charles Johnson’s opinion on the advanced state of North Korea’s nuclear weapons then Rightymouse would be posting pictures of gay men wearing just a smile and a banana hammock and I would be posting Nightwish videos.

    Bonk, just keep the place going. If money is a problem then I can help.

    • Octopus says:

      Every once in a blue moon Gus pretends he doesn’t check here every day, and mentions us, his greatest and onliest fans, as some kind of crazy stalkers. It’s as if the aliens humans have been courting around the universe for 50 years suddenly responded with a radio-burst of, “Okay, we see you. We’re just here, minding our own business. Carry on.”

      I have a small group of people that have been monitoring me for almost 9 years now. Really strange.
      13 minutes ago
      People on the internet find people they hate and chase them down for the rest of their lives. That’s weird.
      16 minutes ago

      We don’t hate you, Gus. We enjoy the hell out of your daily follies, and nightly descents into drugged-out oblivion. Keep going! 😆

      We also enjoy your slavish devotion to Fatass McDumbth, and your occasional spats with the lefty fringe. Again….keep going!

    • Bunk X says:

      ISTE– This ain’t my blog, I’m just doing what I can to keep Gus entertained. I’m concerned that the Blog Owner(s) might forget to renew the domain again, but that’s out of my control.

  30. Octopus says:

    Chunky is incensed with the Bernie-boyz!

    I made these statements because Bernie is out there again attacking the Democratic Party, and I’m done giving him a pass for that.
    1 minute ago
    And now I’ll be attacked by Bernie-or-busters for the next three days for not bowing to their dear leader. Been there, done that.
    16 minutes ago
    “Bernie would have won!?” Nope. If Bernie had been the Democratic candidate Trump’s victory would have been even larger.
    21 minutes ago
    Even Donald Trump promoted Sanders in his campaign rallies, with direct appeals to liberals.
    46 minutes ago
    Right wing media were doing all they could to help promote the Sanders campaign.
    48 minutes ago
    Everyone knows that the right wing noise machine would have absolutely loved it if Bernie Sanders had won the Democratic nomination, right?
    49 minutes ago

    You know, Fatass…it seems it wouldn’t have mattered one whit if Socialist Bernie had won the nomination. Socialist-Banshee-Horror Shrillary lost just as bigly as Bernie would have. You were backing a loser either way. Kind of like the way The Streak has gone for you: one loss after another, without respite or surcease.

    • Minnowredux says:

      uh-oh…. Charles is “done giving him a pass for that”.

      Stand by for 3rd grade invective……..

  31. Octopus says:

    As usual, there is absolutely no evidence given for this statement, and it’s probably wrong. Sanders was riding the same groundswell of dumb kids and socialist wackjobs that elected Obama twice, and he was promising them the moon and stars. He was free of the lifetime of scandal and dark episodes (MURTHER!) that dogged Shrillary, and he was free of her screeching, unlistenable voice. I think he would have made it closer, but still lost big in the electoral college.

  32. rightymouse says:

    Does anyone know what happened to poster “Because”?? I miss him. And Beed. 😦

    • Dwells38 says:

      Haven’t heard. Probably just busy. Actual busy. Not butt hurt busy like Ludwig Van Butthoven after an Assweasel thrashing. LOL!

      • Octopus says:

        I remember him making a couple of comments about how tedious Chunky had become, and then he was talking about this new thing the kids have, called “Twitter.” He has an account there named after his dog, but I’ve been out in the sun all day drinking beer so I can’t recall the name. It will come to me by tomorrow, most likely.

  33. Dwells38 says:

    Creepy self hating Jew Senator Schumer has social drinks with anti-American globalist and financial backer of left wing thug and anti-Semitic groups (like BLM, ACORN and OWS) Alex Soros, son of Senator Palpatine look-alike George Soros. The latter makes this comical subconscious slip about Schumer in his Instagram comment:

    Alex Soros posted the photo to his Instagram account with the caption: ‘Always great to catch up with Senator Chuck Schumer who has seized the moment as the head of the Democrats in the Senate and masterfully helped preserve the assault on our nations values and democracy. Thank you Chuck!’

  34. Dwells38 says:

    LOL! Gut one Ted!!

  35. Octopus says:

    Fatass effed up, agin. 😆

    Here’s the fake that Chunky fell for: