Joyeux Mardi Gras Au Roi Charles!

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It’s Fat Tuesday and menu boards happen.


LGF Stats Inspection Time

Once in a while it’s kinda fun to check on the Decline of Little Green Footballs. Remember this one from 19 February 2010?

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About a year later, on 9 February 2011, we posted this:

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The Webworth.info site is now defunct as far as we can tell, but now there’s WEBUKA. Here’s the February 2017 estimate for LGF:

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GAH! What a graphic abomination, and there’s not much we can do to fix it. On the other hand, the estimated numbers are relevant. In just six years, Charles Johnson’s website value has decreased in value by approximately 75%. So what does Alexa have to say about all this?

Since we last checked in with Alexa, it had been purchased by Amazon and a lot of the freebee stats are no longer available without a pay-to-play subscription. So what. This is all we need.

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What happened in September 2016 to drive down his rank, and why did he get a bump once Trump was inaugurated? I don’t know, Babs, but I do know this: Little Green Footballs is STILL slower to load than 2/3 of all websites tracked by Alexa. Go figger.

[Sources: This, this and this.]

SitePrice estimates the value of a blog differently, and comes up with this number:

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It also provides a graphic of the top 5 search terms that lead to Little Green Footballs:

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No real surprises in that subliminal goatse, but how does “A. J. Delgado” make it to the Top Five with only 5%? Something smells like your socks, Charles.

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The Original Little Green Footballs Logo

 


Self-Explanatory & Posted With Comment.

Yeah, right, Charles. When have you retracted anything besides a Luxo Lamp? You want us to list your uncorrected fups again for your fans? Let’s start with this: Buckhead, Jeremy Chrysler’s .gif, LGF Statistics, Breitbart’s Menu Board, the AirCav hat, the Tennessee State Flag, the Ohio State Flag, Saint Pancake…  There are many more ChuckFails and too many to recall on short notice. Once we have the list with links we’ll add it to The Ruse and Fail series, and then we’ll laugh and laugh and laugh.

Charles, you’re a mess.


Charles Johnson buys into the hoax, doubles down and backs up an avowed Russian Marxist

Holy crap. Twitchy beat us to it.

There’s a despicable fabrication claiming that Trump Advisor Stephen Miller follows neonazis and retweets them, and Charles Johnson promotes the fraud on his own website. Never mind the fact that Johnson follows and re-tweets neonazis himself, but if someone else does it, for whatever reason, Johnson believes he has the authority to send them off to Purgatory or something.

Here’s the full screencap.
[Click on it if you’re squints aren’t so good.]

fake-news-1Okay, nobody really cares about the vapors emanating from that rambling contrived diatribe authorized and posted by Charles Johnson, and he will likely delete it once he realizes that he’s pantsed himself again, even though he updated, backed up, and doubled down. Check out the Johnson updates:

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Yep. You got it right. Johnson bought into a hoax and backed up his pet Russian Marxist. Charles, you’re a mess.

[h/t TreBob]


Charles Johnson knows all about the PRONK.

I honestly don’t know what to make of this, except that it seems to be a collection of strawmen posted by someone who got tanked by sundown. Charles Johnson’s screed is incoherent.

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Johnson seems to be flopping and flailing for attention by spitting stupid.
“Lying to the nation?”
“The whole world goes pear-shaped?”
OMG WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

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Note the plurals. Someone needs to loosen that self-imposed tourniquet on The Magical Jazzy Ponytail, because that there’s another Charles Johnson FAIL.


R.I.P Al Jarreau 1940 -2017

Jazz legend and former associate of Charles “Icarus” Johnson has died at 76. Charles who was just a  backup guitarist to Jarreau has been estranged from the Jazz legend for years. Reasons are unknown, but my hunch is Icarus did something wrong.

Al Jarreau, famed R&B and jazz singer died Sunday morning … according to his reps.

The 7-time Grammy winner had been hospitalized recently in Los Angeles. Amid his medical battle … he announced he would be retiring. He’d been touring almost non-stop for 50 years.

A message on his website says he passed away while in the hospital. The announcement doesn’t say what he died from — but Al had fought through respiratory and cardiac issues in recent years.

Just last week, Al’s son said his father was singing “Moonlighting” to one of his nurses.

Rest in peace AL, unlike Charles people will always remember your musical talent.


Confidential to @Green_Footballs Johnson: Stop doing this.

cheetos-chairThe Cheeto Chair:  Results Of Eating 1 Bag Of Cheetos Every Day For Years And Wiping Hand On Seat. Yes, That Is Mold.