Charles Johnson off to a bad start this season


Of course our own Charles Johnson was always  how shall we say too “chubby” to be much of an athlete, hence his disdain for Baseball and Football. Our Charles Jonson aka The Race Detective is unemployed, on public assistance, embittered, and paranoid. Combine that with being a shut-in, and junk food addict, he is quite the catch for any lucky lady (who happens to be homeless I suppose).


172 Comments on “Charles Johnson off to a bad start this season”

  1. Minnow says:

    The funniest part of all of this is that Barry thinks he is at the top of his game – poised and ready for the fame and fortune that he believes he so richly deserves!!!




  2. Daedalus says:

    Charles is having a bad time both on and off the internet.

  3. Arachne says:

    This is why Porky won’t change his avatar. I’m sure he “follows back” certain women followers so that he can “DM” them on Twitter. Since they think he’s a relatively good-looking and athletic 50 year-old, they probably send him “oooo, I love you” messages. He’ll always find an excuse never to meet them actually, but he’ll satisfy himself (literally) knowing the babes are out there, being his modern-day Sharmuta.

    • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

      Well, he is a “master debater,” by his own reckoning. An old hand, going back to high school. Had a rosy future, in the palm of his hand. It was too slippery, and got away from him entirely.

    • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

      And we all know what “sharmuta” means in Arabic. 😈

    • Frank Sinclair says:

      Your wife is followed by Ron Jeremy and his mammoth member.
      Meanwhile no one follows me — too busy crossing the street to get away.

      • Pakimon {_(",)_} says:

        frank’s mom isn’t “followed” by Ron Jeremy, she just gets buggered by him.

      • SpaceAllah says:

        And we’re back to male porn stars and people’s wives and daughters again. This is what happens when you can’t discuss things on merits alone.

      • That’s because most things discussed on this board have no merit. They aren’t worthy of discussion.

      • SpaceAllah says:

        So what’s your purpose on a site dedicated to talking shit about Three Chin Charlie? Because that’s what this is all about. Reaping what one sews. Act like an asshole, this is the repercussion. This is the virtual representation of throwing rotten tomatoes. Why would you expect serious discuss when the central subject is so seriously unserious,, he wears a fire hose for a belt? In this instance, this is your problem, not ours. Three Chin Charlie told us to get our own site, so we did. What we do here shouldn’t be his concern since he bid us and a double digit waistline adieu. So if you’re some third party to this, expecting some kind of debate, forget it. No one gives a shit. And you’ve been told this. The fact that you keep returning and complaining means either you’re too stupid to comprehend the words coming out of my mouth here, or your life is just that pathetic. Either way, it doesn’t look good for ya buddy.

  4. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    Not trying to be alarmist or anything, but does anyone know Gus’s real name? It’s very odd that he’s gone silent like this, after such a total spin-out, which was preceded by a long deterioration in his mood and mental faculties. Lord knows the morbidly-obese ponytail won’t bother checking anything, besides his fridge.

    Note: my own google turned up the following “clue:”

    Good times!

  5. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    He tried so hard to ingratiate himself with Comic Book Guy:

  6. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    War Hero Hired As Anchor By MSNBC:

    Nothing happened. Don’t ask, not telling. Just act normal. 😆

  7. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    I thought the Obama economy was roaring.

    • OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

      It’s Parker and Stone’s fault:

      • OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

        See? California’s homeless are mostly from SOMEWHERE ELSE that just won’t address the problems RepubliKKKans cause.

        Likes evil, murder-inducing gunz flowing into Chicago from the lawless redneck bordering states, LA’s homeless issue is just because someone else somewhere else isn’t doing National Socialism right!

    • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

      So THAT’S what happened to Gus.

      • OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

        If Gus was smart, he’d sneak into the country illegally from Mexico and get some of that sweet sweet free shit for voting Dem, instead of being bent over and @ss-r@ped by the Boy King’s wondrous economic policies.

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        “If Gus was smart…”

        Aye, there’s the rub.

  8. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    Uh-oh. He’s being cereal.

  9. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    This is a hoot. It reminds me of Toot.

    He claims grainy, shaky video is part of a mountain of evidence showing shadowy government forces are using planes to secretly spray fine particles of heavy metals like aluminum into the sky.

    Aluminum is a heavy metal? This sounds like Toot science. It’s heavy enough for gravity to work on it. 😆 😆 😆

    • OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

      Wait, the media was fine with believing George Bush aimed a hurricane at New Orleans.

      Either we have weather control, or we don’t.

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        There are documented photos of Dubya planting explosives in the dikes in order to flood N’Awlins and drown black people. There are also photos of him and his Dad taking sniper practice off the roof of the Superdome, during the aftermath. Everyone knows this.

      • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

        Brian Williams saw the dead bodies floating by. The news crew was going to film them but they went for lunch and beers instead.

      • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

        GW: We global warmed some folks.

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        Brian Williams killed an alligator that was about to gobble up a poor black child, with his bare hands!

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        Oh, yeah. And there are pictures of Spiro Agnew planting explosives in the WTC towers when they were under construction. I know, because somebody on the innernet said he seen them.

      • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

        God Bless Brian Williams. If he didn’t really come under enemy fire I’m sure he WOULD have, given the chance. Same thing! Plus Bill O’Reilly.

    • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

      Yes, aluminum is heavy metal. And hollow-point bullets are armor-piercing. Science is both causing and saving us from global warming, and if you disagree with either, you hate science. Disagreeing with a liberal is racist, no matter the topic. Obamacare will insure everyone for next to nothing…well, that one is kinda true. Nothing is insured for nothing. Oh, and you have to kill a baby, to save that baby.

      I could go on, but I can’t go on.

      • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

        That’s so true. Abortion should never happen but everyone should always pay for it. And keep your doctor unless it changes for some reason.

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        Don’t forget all those “shovel-ready” jobs that were set to go, once the Unicorn Messiah saved us with trillions of his own money. Love this post-racial America he brought in, too. The transparency of his administration, is like the purest crystal ever. Kids in school eating so healthy, thanks to Michelle. No more war. The extended olive-branch, embraced by the Muslim world that Dubya had invaded so crazily. The reset-button with Russia, and now Putin is like our best friend and ally, next to the head mullah of Iran.

        Everything is great now, thanks to Obama.

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        You missed the memo from Robert Reich. He said that he was going to make sure that there weren’t going to be any jobs for white men. That’s why they didn’t build any infrastructure with it. That worked out fabulously for black men, didn’t it?

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        Everything workeded perfectly. Stop h8ting.

  10. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    Spanky really needs a monkey to spank.

  11. livefreeor die says:

    Hi all,
    Dropped out of sight again-my mother-in-law was doing better and than suddenly died this weekend. Trying to get everything together.
    At least Chuckles never changes.

  12. Minnow says:

    Seriously folks, does anyone believe a single thing the slack-jawed, drooling idiot Barry states as fact?

    Hahahahahahaha. Seriously folks…..


  13. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    This is for livefreeor die:


    • Captain Death says:

      How about GoFuckeMe Charlize?.

    • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

      Unique coverage of news, politics, culture such as:

      Calling Pam Geller a racist
      Calling Donald Trump a racist
      Calling Glen Greenwald a racist
      Calling Ginger a racist

      And then we switch things around and

      Call the entire GOP a bunch of racists!

      We also cover famous guitarists by:

      Calling Ted Nugent a racist

    • Arachne says:

      “Unique coverage”? Is that what he’s calling appropriating three-day old stories and attempting to repackage them as his own work? Funny. We call it theft of intellectual property in my office. Right before we file a lawsuit.

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        Toot’s at least got the advantage of being judgment proof. Suing him is like trying to beat gold doubloons out of a jellyfish.

    • Help Charles Johnson fart out insightful tweets, such as “Fuck off. You’re blocked.”

  14. Captain Death says:

    “Advertising helps, but it doesn’t cover all our costs. So here’s where you can help us continue to keep LGF a vibrant community — by donating as much as you can to our blog fund. Thanks very much for your support!”

    The check is in the mail Douchenozzle

    • kbdabear says:

      To everyone who’s donated so far: thank you sincerely for supporting LGF! We’ve gotten more than a quarter of the way toward our goal, but we still need your help to make it the rest of the way. Donate today to help LGF continue our fight against the reactionary forces of the right wing (with lots of music and comedy along the way)!

      Music? Youtube links that anyone can directly access.

      Lots of comedy, Toot? Sorry to crush your delusions, but they’re laughing AT you, not with you.

      • Arachne says:

        $3000. Jim-Rob pulls that in in an afternoon during a 2-week freepathon. And I still think he’s taking out and “donating” back to himself.

        We seem to manage well enough without ads. So does the Mother Ship

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        It’s still comedy, but we get to point and laugh for free. I’ll bet that reddens his tuchas.

    • kbdabear says:

      Toot: “MKH got all those GFM donations because her husband died in a bike accident? HEY, I’ve had a bike accident too! Must be money in that!”

    • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

      He misspelled vibrator.

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        Fatass should just ask the 11 sickophants for money directly, and be done with it. Nobody outside of his stanky echo-chamber is going to give him a plugged nickel. Real, worthy causes make their goals in hours or a couple days. Not six months, and only 30% there, including all your pump-priming self-donations. 😦

  15. kbdabear says:

    Episcopalians? They’re about 2 months away from starting each service with Allah Akbar, and if God isn’t your thing that’s OK too.

    The Anglican Church and most other mainstream denominations have become networking centers for liberal yuppies.

    • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

      That’s our Furious Burka speaking, “For every bigoted, hateful Christian we read about and see on TV…,” and there’s Fatass tweeting it out like he wrote the glurge. A plague on both their bunkers. 😆

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        But the offer still stands to fix her twat.

      • Arachne says:

        Note use of the word “probably.” BTW, Furious Bovine, how many evil Christians are you hearing about. BTW, how many acts of terrorism committed since 9/11 IN THE NAME OF Christianity? How many? NONE.

        How many acts of terror committed IN THE NAME OF Islam? Over 24,000.

        So go find some highway traffic to play in.

      • Chunky's Missing Brain says:

        Naw that wouldn’t work. People would think she was just a giant trash bag and avoid hitting her for fear of damaging their car.

      • pineapple says:

        Yea she’s a scumbag. I’d like to force feed her a bacon falafel. That might fix her twat.

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        Trouble. It comes in a bag.

  16. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    Those of us who smelled a stinky rat in the clockmaker’s story, while Chunky railed against the science-haters on the Right who don’t get electronic wizardry (ca. 1970’s Radio Shack), have been completely validated by the police finally getting part of their story into the media. So, Chunky’s Streak is intact, thank Allah. 😆

    Gotta love how Obama jumped in to congratulate the boy and invite him to the WH even before pics of the “clock” made it to the media. That’s what I call “Unicorn Science.” 🙂

  17. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    The SJW Revolution devours its own, once again. Susan Brownmiller, in the words of today’s feminazi (remember when that appellation seemed a bit extreme?), is “equivalent to a ’70’s chauvinist male.” Wow.

    • OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

      This is what happens, Ms. Brownmiller, when you teach young skulls full of mush your views, rather than teaching them to think for themselves.

      You played your part in programming these zombies; at least you aren’t running from them.

  18. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    WGN News thought this an appropriate symbol for Yom Kippur. Looks like something Chunky would do. 😆

  19. kbdabear says:

    Toot blows another RASSIZZZMMMM non-story

  20. OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

    Comment on Twitchy: “Clocks don’t look like bombs, but paperclip lantern holders are a clear substitute for a necktie party. Why do we listen to this white fraud again?”

    Another “It’s almost as if these people are DISAPPOINTED that they haven’t discovered more evidence of racism…oh…right…they ARE disappointed. That’s how they get attention and make a living….”

  21. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    From Ace, it appears the gentle clockmaker’s sister was also accused of bombing her school, or something…how oddly coincidental is that?

    Ahmad the Gentle Clock-Builder’s Sister Got Suspended for Alleged Bomb Threat; Daily Beast Reporter Not Only Fails to Follow Up on this Major Story Thread, But Fails to Show Any Interest Whatsoever

    Ummm… this seems very interesting to me.

    Ahmad’s sister Eyman says this to Narrative-Weaver Randy Pats, who fails to so much as raise an eyebrow:

    After the MSNBC segment, Eyman and I sit down in the hallway where she says the same thing happened to her as Ahmed.
    “I got suspended from school for three days from this stupid same district, from this girl saying I wanted to blow up the school, something I had nothing to do with.”

    “I got suspended and I didn’t do anything about it and so when I heard about Ahmed, I was so mad because it happened to me and I didn’t get to stand up, so I’m making sure he’s standing up because it’s not right. So I’m not jealous, I’m kinda like–it’s like he’s standing for me.”

    It is indeed a lot like that.

    It is so much like that it sounds to me like a possible motive for bringing a hoax bomb to school, to “stand up” for his sister who had been, she claims, falsely accused of wanting to “blow up the school.”

    But this doesn’t fit the Narrative — or rather, it can be written to seemingly confirm the Narrative — so Randy the Narrative-Weaver just dutifully jots this down without making any connections whatsoever, or asking any further questions about it.

    Oh, man. Such racism. Cry, the beloved country. 😆

  22. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    We have musics and the comedy, too, and with no begging to speak of.

  23. rightymouse says:

    Am worried about Gus. Do we need to call Denver PD?

  24. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    This comment thread is illuminating.

    You can tell the liberals. They all start out with “I don’t care if he didn’t actually build a clock because…”

    Dickheads. Why does this world have so many dickheads???

    • rightymouse says:

      Don’t they consider themselves fact-based realists? To laff. They wind up hoisted on their own dickhead petards.

      • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

        And you want to know how to tell the real hard-core progs? They’re the ones saying that this kid’s dad’s wealth is irrelevant.

        It would be hilarious if it wasn’t so pathetic.

  25. windbag says:

    I don’t think the news is all bad. I heard he found a girlfriend.

  26. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:


  27. livefreeor die says:

    Hi all,
    Thanks so much for the support. It’s really appreciated.
    Glad to hear Gus has reappeared. Someone has to give me the cliff notes on what happened to him this week.

    • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

      It’s pretty simple. He vanished off of Twitter for a little short of 72 hours. For a guy who obsessive-compulsively tweets every few minutes, that’s alarming.

    • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

      Anyway, I already tossed one rotten egg at Toot with your name on it. I don’t want to waste them on his banal tweets, I’m waiting for an incredibly dumb one. I usually get several of those a day.

  28. kbdabear says:

    So did Rathergate, but you kind of keep that quiet, don’t you Toot

    • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

      Oh, fer gawd sake.

      [This rant is in the name of livefreeor die]

      He finds a comment. A FARKING COMMENT!!! that says that the writer of the comment heard that Obama was not born in Hawaii, and was looking for more information. And that’s proof that “trutherism” started at that blog? A question based on something that he had previously heard somewhere?

      Logic fail. If he’s asking the question, this isn’t where it “began”. Holy moly this guy is mentally mental.

      Mo Pro on a moped…

    • Yea until I stumble upon better info, I have to agree with CJ on this one. Certainly the pro-Hillary sites (HillBuzz, etc.) were very vocal about the “birther” angle, but I don’t recall it coming directly from her campaign.

      And even this requires a fact check:

      I really don’t want to see HRC get the nomination but truth is truth.

      • Bunk X says:

        If the Clinton War Machine couldn’t come up with anything substantial by 2008, it doesn’t exist, and by now it doesn’t matter.

      • Arachne says:

        Chen, the problem for him is that the billboards he proffers as proof did not go up until 2009. Hillary supporters flloated the foreign birth concept around in 2008. The first time I heard about it was during the primary, when it was disparaged by talk radio. Remember how they went after McCain after doubts about Obama were raised? Difference is McCain immediately produced his BC and obtained a legal opinion on eligibility.

  29. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    Thank God you’re okay, Gustavo. And back to tweeting about your aches and pains, and meds to combat the gimpy-pain. Order restored. Tip a tin for me, you bull of the pampas, you!

  30. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    Notice how Chunky’s clammed-up on the clockmaker charade? Wondering why? It’s because he always moves on from the scene of every fireworks-factory inferno, once the thing goes into low orbit. 😆

    The series of disclosures — that Ahmad did not “invent” a clock, but merely took a Radio Shack clock out of its casing and stuck it in a pencil box; that his sister had been previously suspended for allegedly threatening to blow up the school; that his sister was feeding him his lines when he spoke to Mark Cuban; that the family is collecting money to sue; that Ahmad’s dad is a committed activist: that Irving’s mayor has been targeted by Muslim activists for rejecting Sharia — all of these disclosures are, taken together, suggesting this was a deliberate stunt, a provocation intended to trick the very gullible and leftwing and America-hating into adding their support to The Cause.

    That’s you, Fatass. You did your part. You should be very proud. Broke as a joke, but proud.

    • Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

      And halal. Or at least as halal as a porker can get.

    • calo says:

      Bravo, Octi. I couldn’t agree more with you wit and wisdom tonight.

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        You’re a person of rare discernment, Calo. 😉

        Me, I wish I had a little of what Gustavo is smoking tonight. Too much merpt going on tonight.

    • I concluded it was a stunt when I saw that post virtually proving that he used an existing clock. That changes everything.

      However I don’t know if the family could have predicted how viral it went. I think they were hoping it would have made a splash on the local level there with everything that was going on, or at least a case where a nerdy Muslim (and undoubtedly picked-on) kid pulls a prank to get attention. But a invite to the WH? Praise from Zuckerberg? etc. I don’t think they saw that coming.

      No wonder tho he doesn’t want to go back to that school. They all know what he did.

  31. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    Weed and tweeting, though, that’s fine. In fact, it’s important to make sure you smoke enough weed to keep the surly redneck inside you in check, late at night when the methanol’s making you mean.

  32. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:


    • Minnow says:

      So proclaims Dr. Barry, the esteemed doctor of psychiatry with the 10th grade education, and the emotional maturity of an eleven year old girl.

      …and the 54-inch waistline.

      …and the three chins.

    • pineapple says:

      Hey Fatso you sent out this tweet today asking your 13,8K followers and your tiny blog to donate to your GoFundMe.

      10 hours later……. NOTHING.

      Hey asshole……who is deluded and not right in the head?

      How embarrassed must you be to have zero support, and a GoFundMe that’s dead..

      • Minnow says:

        Hey Barry, you should have re-worded your plaintive cry to read “continue our unique coverage of news, politics, culture…” from our “office” at our “world headquarters”.

        “Our” fatty?

        Who, you and the cockroaches?


        Who are you kidding?


  33. JimboXL says:

    What are all the global warming coffee sipping hipster drones going to do now that their beloved VW has cheated the green fascists? Very amusing and quite entertains news.

  34. I know I like the thought better that we DIDN’T have 14 y/o kids saber-rattling in schools with pencil case hoax bombs. Everyone does. Maybe that’s why the other narrative got pushed so damn hard before

    But there it is, what looks like exactly that, in the context of the local political dynamics.

    We should also be alarmed that everyone, everywhere’s automatic assumption was that the school authorities & the cops were all just racist buffoons, all based on a 140 c. headline on twitter. That is not a good recipe.

  35. Minnow says:


    I can’t stop laughing!!!!!!

  36. Minnow says:

    Hey Barry, flee the temptation of narcissism.

  37. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    Spanky funny funny ha ha. ^^^^^

  38. Because yooge olo (•Y•) says:

    Everything’s right again with the world.

    • Bunk X says:

      One word to find them.
      One word to bind them.
      One word to rule them all
      And in the dorkness…AHAHAHAHHAHA NO I CAN’T DO IT! LOLOLOLOL!

  39. Bunk X says:

  40. Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

    I can’t handle this story. There’s something wrong, I can’t reconcile.

    Maybe Chunky or that pedophile who writes for Salon can explain it to me, why our country is defending and fighting for the likes of these Afghan beasts.

    • Minnow says:

      shameful and disgusting that we allow this shit to continue….. AND to punish the brave and honorable men (and women) who stand up for the abused children.

      Anyone who “looks the other way”, or justifies this crap by assigning it to cultural differences is insane and complicit.

      And, preemptively…. fuck you Barry, you spineless, immoral piece of shit.

    • The sexual culture of Afghanistan is so completely messed up. Horrific place in every way.

  41. Pakimon {_(",)_} says:

    I hate to think what sort of deviant deeds Gus committed to put him in such a state.

    He earned enough change to reload his Obamaphone so I guess it was worth it to him. 😆

    • Pakimon {_(",)_} says:

      I think gus’ story is taking a dark and sordid turn.

      I hope he doesn’t start tweeting about the “interesting things” lodged in his various bodily orifices the last two days. 😮 😆

      • Octopus ¯\_(''-)_/¯ says:

        I think they are connected, the lodgers in his mind and body. I, too, am afraid of the particulars. 😯

    • Pakimon {_(",)_} says:

      Maybe some Preparation H and one of those donut cushions would help. 😆

    • Pakimon {_(",)_} says:

      But are they worth all the mysterious new pains from having “interesting things” lodged in you?

  42. Pakimon {_(",)_} says:

    Fun fact: “bought” is Gus-speak for scavenged from the dumpster. 😆

  43. OLT's It's Fucking BRIGHT Outside The Donkey Show says:

    Obama birtherism started at pro-Hillary sites.

    Which, of course, the Clinton Machine had ABSOLUTELY no control over, nor contact with.


    Also, The Donkey Show is suitable for all ages, every whore in Tijuana is a virgin, Global Warming is real, Christians are trying to start a theocracy in the US, the biggest issue in public schools is Creationism, legal marijuana will solve the drug war’s faults, white cops are hunting and killing black people, Chicago’s murder rate is due to the easy availability of guns in other states, and little Ahmed built a clock.

  44. Beverly P says:

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