Hey Ho! Let’s Go! The 2013 LGF Awards Voting Is Underway!

POLL NOW CLOSED

Let’s begin with THE BUZZSAW AWARDBuzzsaw blank100: Traditionally, this award goes for the best flounce of the year.  This year we’re going to expand the field of candidates to include those few daring and intrepid lizards who deliberately sat/stepped/stomped upon the LGF eggshells, who eschewed updings and who contradicted the gangrenous group-think hive-mind so prevalent in The Swamp.

Nominations were culled from the comments in here, but you may nominate any and all who were inadvertently overlooked. If we missed anyone it’s entirely your fault because we’re a goddam echo chamber and you just didn’t speak up loud enough. And if you pla-doh-faces think we’re gonna add up the numbers by hand, well, we are. Eventually.

Have at it.

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150 Comments on “Hey Ho! Let’s Go! The 2013 LGF Awards Voting Is Underway!”

  1. Pakimon says:

    Vote for me or I’m going to flounce your wife’s/sister’s/mom’s/daughter’s eggshell like a buzzsaw!

    I’m so lonely…

    /Frabby Chunklair

  2. Pakimon says:

    Someone voted “Not many to choose from”?!?!

    What about me?!

    I’m so groovy, it’s awesome!

    /Frabby Chunklair aka Sniveling Attention-Whore

  3. Pakimon says:

    I’m sure stubby is frantically trying to get on here and start endlessly pimping and voting for himself. 😆

    http://tinyurl.com/kofer4c

  4. rightymouse says:

    Content over at LGF was too thin last year. Can I put the name of someone listed in the Baltimore obits??

  5. rightymouse says:

    It’s -17 degrees here this morning in NE Ohio. 😯

    • Pakimon says:

      Looks like you don’t need this handy ‘Freeze Indicator” to know it’s cold. 😆

      http://tinyurl.com/lejep4j

    • Arachne says:

      POLAR VORTEX!!!
      Amazing how they always have something made up to explain away the fact that we’re freezing in the midst of all this “warming.”

      • Because says:

        Cuz ‘vortex’ sounds all sciency and shit.

      • rightymouse says:

        “Polar Vortex” was used in the disaster movie “The Day After Tomorrow”. Here’s a Yahoo link ‘splaining all this and the polar vortexing of global warmening.

        http://ca.news.yahoo.com/blogs/geekquinox/polar-vortex-hitting-canada-u-brutal-bone-chilling-191356599.html

      • icekoldebassman says:

        Now here are some great reads, perfect for putting the AGW Evangelicals in their proper place.

      • Octopus says:

        What a load of silly, in that Yahoo piece of glurge! 😆

        I liked this comment, setting us Deniers straight once and for all:

        Grant • 16 minutes ago Report Abuse
        If you really think “we cant trust scientists” because supposedly they earn money from claiming ACC, you have to distrust the so-called skeptics 10,000 times more, because the oil and coal companies who dispute Anthropogenic Climate Change earn about 10,000 times more money from lying than any scientist will get. Not to mention lying politicians and consultants in the pocket of oil companies (Bush, Cheney, Harpo and of course lying Ira). Only scientists funded by oil and coal companies claim ACC is false, and their “research” doesnt pass per review.

        Color me chastened, Grant. 😳

      • rightymouse says:

        I told the colleague who sent that link to me that I found the article hilarious. I’ve not heard anything back. Wonder if he’s a liberal? 😆

      • I cannot stop shaking my head in disbelief that there are today those who cannot tolerate dissension and show all the traits of the religious fanatic with their condemnations and cries of ‘heretic!’
        I love how Ann Coulter said it:

        If there were a modern Spanish Inquisition in America today, it wouldn’t be Bob Jones rounding up Catholics. It would be liberals rounding up right-wingers and putting them on trial for hate [or, thought] crimes. The liberal Torquemadas would be smug and angry and self-righteous. And when they were done, they would proudly announce they had finally banished intolerance.

        Ann Coulter, Slander, Liberal Lies About the American Right [Crown Publishers, 2002], p.196

      • Thought crimes. Scroll about half-way down …
        http://www.friesian.com/moral-2.htm

    • Octopus says:

      We stayed at -15 all night, and it’s -10 now. Supposed to warm up to 0 today! 😆

      “Polar Vortex: Now Do You Deniers Believe Us About Climate Change?”

  6. Because says:

    Really not much of a contest. It takes talent to get banned for Hunan rice.

  7. Doppel B. DeMilyo says:

    And it’s Stabby in last place with zero votes.

  8. Octopus says:

    http://www.powerlineblog.com/archives/2014/01/rachel-maddow-is-crazy-too.php

    Shocking to find out that Chunky’s Love-Crush Madcow has the exact same amount of integrity as he does!

  9. Octopus says:

    I always enjoy reading Camille Paglia, but then I see that she’s voted twice for Obama, and it just ruins it for me. 😦

    • Because says:

      You have to wonder about these wimmins like her and Althouse and Noonan, who seem to have made a shtick out of being shocked; shocked! that incompetence is going on.

  10. Because says:

    Octopus :
    What a load of silly, in that Yahoo piece of glurge!
    I liked this comment, setting us Deniers straight once and for all:
    Grant • 16 minutes ago Report Abuse
    If you really think “we cant trust scientists” because supposedly they earn money from claiming ACC, you have to distrust the so-called skeptics 10,000 times more, because the oil and coal companies who dispute Anthropogenic Climate Change earn about 10,000 times more money from lying than any scientist will get. Not to mention lying politicians and consultants in the pocket of oil companies (Bush, Cheney, Harpo and of course lying Ira). Only scientists funded by oil and coal companies claim ACC is false, and their “research” doesnt pass per review.

    Color me chastened, Grant.

    As a snotsickle forms on his nose…

  11. Octopus says:

    Fatass is fighting back! 😆

  12. Octopus says:

    Me too! Me too!

    • windbag says:

      These are the same fools, who will gladly point to the thermometer next August to prove that global warming exists. Nobody (with a brain) denies that weather and temperature fluctuate. The crowd that views man as a cancer on the face of Mother Gaia is the group that thinks my A/C is destroying crops in Ireland.

      Same crowd that thinks that Earth is over-populated, UFOs exist, and a nuclear winter is just a push of a button away.

      Fools and tools.

    • Arachne says:

      Of course there’s climate change, dumbo. It’s called seasons.

    • Arachne says:

      Stealing from Ezra Klein, there Gus?

      http://weaselzippers.us/?p=166913

  13. Octopus says:

    We remember well all the alarmist cries of this past July and August, as temps soared into the 90’s in the East! 😯 I mean, you would have thought it was…summer. Or Armageddon. 😆

  14. Octopus says:

    BWAHAHAHAHASHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! (SNORT)

    Gus is now an authority on linguistics. And commie America-haters. 😆

  15. Octopus says:

    Thank God our Fatass made the list! 😆

    • Arachne says:

      Oh Gus, watching you and Fatass tilt at the windmills. So funny. Does he dress up like Quixote and ride a stick horse with a cardboard sword? I bet you look fetching as Sancho Panza.

  16. Your wife gets the Hoover award going away.

    • Arachne says:

      Now now Frankie, don’t be jealous. Just cause YOUR wife had that permanent restraining order issued against you. Maybe it was the sex offender conviction that did it. Well, that and peeping in the neighbor’s windows.

  17. Because penis penis penis lol says:

    • Arachne says:

      Starting with your own blog, Blubberbutt. But please double down. Your beclownment is always but always entertaining. BTW, why haven’t you mentioned that the trapped ship was looking for evidence of Global Warming? Oh that’s right…..because then you’d ALL look stupid.

      Oh, and the Polar Vortex is scheduled, I guess to end this week.

    • OLT's How Does He Do It? says:

    • Because religion of freezes says:

      The faith is strong in that one…

    • And, did you know, Chunkles, that Breitbart’s writers probably do more research and question more ‘authority’ than you and your ignorant minions combined.

    • And, did you know, Chunkles, that Breitbart’s writers probably do more research and question more ‘authority’ than you and your ignorant minions combined.

      • Arachne says:

        The closest thing to research Blubberbutt and the Minions have done is recipes to cook salmon. Nothing since.

    • Arachne says:

      Anyone else here think “packed with stories” means they have maybe one or two. Fatass DOES love his hyperbole. You know, remember ONE comment about Nelson Mandela morphed into a thousand raaaaacist comments and that one swipe at him at Weasel Zippers became an entire thread wishing death on him?

    • icekoldebassman says:

      Breitbart•com is packed with stories today mocking science and gloating that cold weather disproves climate change. The idiots are legion.
      1:42 PM – 7 Jan 2014

      I saw one or two articles and a live blog about the cold. The ONE article Chunkles must have been referring to may be this one [which I linked to upstream]. It is but a mere post, addressing the fact CEOs of climate change groups who have had enough of their own deceit are leaving. The ‘article’ is replete with links to other sources — those must be the “packed with stories” he whines about.

      • Arachne says:

        Maybe one of Chuckie’s minions used their Amazon Prime to get him the “Dictionary for Idiots” for Kwanzaa.

  18. Because penis penis penis lol :

    Breitbart•com is packed with stories today mocking science and gloating that cold weather disproves climate change. The idiots are legion.— Charles Johnson (@Green_Footballs) January 07, 2014

    Hey, Chunk, smarter men than you and your ‘scientists’ are not having any of your arrogance.
    http://ep.probeinternational.org/tag/lawrence-solomon/

  19. franksinclair :
    Your wife gets the Hoover award going away.

    You were up all night thinking of this one, yes?

  20. Arachne says:

    icekoldebassman :

    At least someone creative and funny.

    Well, with that requirement, no one from LGF need apply.

  21. OLT's Chomsky Is Full Of It says:

    rightymouse :
    My Dad has a PhD in linguistics. He’s a Dem and thinks Chomsky’s theories are garbage.

    Good grief, I bet you couldn’t cuss at all without a lecture in Anglo-Saxon fricative phonemes.

    It’s OK, my Dad is/was a very constrained cusser for a Texan and a MSgt. He does use a lot of colorful rural/farm phraseology, though, and he likes to “warsh” dishes rather than wash them.

    • Octopus says:

      Would you believe I never heard my Dad swear? Nor did he use the Lord’s name in vain, or the Lord’s Mother. Just used his words, the way the nuns and priests taught him back in ’30’s Buffalo.

      • OLT's Soap Tastes Awful, Do You Remember? says:

        All I know is that sometimes “shit” has two syllables and hearing it is not a good sign.

        There was no blaspeming in our house, either. My maternal grandmother would punish you for saying “Aw, gee” and my mother subscribed to the same theory. Cuss substitutes were cuss words because you meant them that way, so you were punished for those, too.

      • rightymouse says:

        OLT. Had to laugh! My mother soaped my mouth for saying “bloddy hell” when I was about 10. 😆

      • gizbot7 says:

        Ah memories. Us kids couldn’t say “sucks” or any form thereof because it was too close to “shit”. I got around the no cursing rule by quoting movies and songs and mom thought it was cute. LOL

    • rightymouse says:

      My parents don’t swear & I try to keep keep my potty-mouth to a dull roar. Don’t use the eff word, but I do use damn, shit & a-hole when necessary. 🙂

      • Pakimon says:

        Me too!

        Especially when watching Eagles games or when I accidentally smash/jam/stub one or more of my fingers and/or toes. 😆

  22. rightymouse says:

    Here you go, Charlie. Who exactly is stupid??

  23. Juan Epstein says:

    Jimmy went into the Polar Vortex and never came out.

    • Pakimon says:

      And Chunky’s pimping of his Amazon account on Twitter just increased.

      Coincidence? I think not. 😆

  24. Arachne says:

    OLT’s Soap Tastes Awful, Do You Remember? :

    All I know is that sometimes “shit” has two syllables and hearing it is not a good sign.

    There was no blaspeming in our house, either. My maternal grandmother would punish you for saying “Aw, gee” and my mother subscribed to the same theory. Cuss substitutes were cuss words because you meant them that way, so you were punished for those, too.

    In the South, it ALWAYS has two syllables.

  25. Because says:

    Right now, it’s a dead heat between Kalegore and Albusteve. Which is interesting, considering that Kale never flounced, and is still in good standing (though his karma is in the outhouse).

    • rightymouse says:

      It’s probably a good time to declare a weiner & move on to the next category, lolwut?

    • Pakimon says:

      This year we’re going to expand the field of candidates to include those few daring and intrepid lizards who deliberately sat/stepped/stomped upon the LGF eggshells, who eschewed updings and who contradicted the gangrenous group-think hive-mind so prevalent in The Swamp.

      I’d be tempted to vote for Kalegore, but he always seems to follow is “contrariness” with groveling in order to avoid The Stick and preserve his precious LGF account.

      I thought Albusteve flounced in 2012.

      Stubby didn’t want to get the stick. He just fell victim to a bout of Chunky peevishness and his chronic inability to distinguish between humorous dickishness and being an annoying imbecilic asshole.

      “Other” didn’t help because I couldn’t think of any other noteworthy people who flounced or titty twisted Chunkles’ moobs .

      Charles Johnson was a mystery vote unless there was another Charles Johnson other than The Chunkster that went below my radar.

      Had to go with “not_sure”. His brief yet pithy blasting of the sycophant horde was comedy gold. The 40+ “downdingies” he got with each of his handful of comments sealed the deal for me. 😀

  26. Because says:

  27. windbag says:

    Oh, and Time blamed the polar vortex on global cooling in 1974, now it’s the fault of global warming in 2014. Too bad lefties are too stupid to understand science.

    http://www.climatedepot.com/2014/01/07/scientists-reject-claims-of-record-cold-being-caused-by-global-warming-time-mag-blamed-polar-vortex-on-global-cooling-in-1974-special-report/

  28. OLT's Sekrit Ballot says:

    Other = Buck

  29. OLT's Often Preceded by AW says:

    Arachne :

    OLT’s Soap Tastes Awful, Do You Remember? :
    All I know is that sometimes “shit” has two syllables and hearing it is not a good sign.
    There was no blaspeming in our house, either. My maternal grandmother would punish you for saying “Aw, gee” and my mother subscribed to the same theory. Cuss substitutes were cuss words because you meant them that way, so you were punished for those, too.

    In the South, it ALWAYS has two syllables.

    In Texas there is a distinction, in my experience:

    “shit” gets scraped off your boot
    “shee-yit/shee-yut” means run if you’re the owner of the baseball that went through the window

    • Octopus says:

      Heard one the other day, referring to a woman of great experience: “She’s been around more than shit on a wagon wheel.”

  30. OLT's I Can Taste It Even Now says:

    rightymouse :
    OLT. Had to laugh! My mother soaped my mouth for saying “bloddy hell” when I was about 10.

    Two words: Irish. Spring.

  31. OLT's Because Shut In says:

    Arachne :
    But….but….who would bring you Cheetos?

    Amazon.com, and then only via UPS, who has to come to your house whether they like it or not.

  32. Octopus says:

    This would make a nice, easy winter project for you, Gus. I’m sure Sis would love it, too. Get crackin’!

  33. Apollodorus V says:

    albusteve’s parting shot:

    28 albusteve Jan 22, 2012 14:10:53 -22

    re:#21 Sergey Romanov
    Why do you behave this way?

    because it’s makes me feel good to mock the junkies and all the phony shit people post

    56 seconds later…

    30 Charles Jan 22, 2012 14:11:49 +13

    re#28 albusteve

    That’s the last straw for me.

    • Pakimon says:

      Heh.

      I thought I saw Albusteve up for a Buzzsaw last year.

      Guess his name and Chunky’s were added this year to see if anyone is actually paying attention or just “mailing it in”. 😆

      Thanks. Apollodorus.

  34. JimboXL says:

    I picture globos going out into the cold dead night in negative weather with swirling winds and snow all around them screaming “I still believe, I still believe” at the top of their lungs as their tears turn to ice.

  35. livefreeor die says:

    I’m surprised that Chuckie hasn’t read his latest marching orders from Media Matters and started viciously attacking Robert Gates. The s–t storm from his book is going to hit hard!

    • Arachne says:

      I hope that if that witch Hildebeest runs, that the mother of our slain ambassador becomes a visible presence, demanding answers. She should not be allowed to run away from this, and God knows the media will be giving her cover.

  36. Apollodorus V says:

    Not really a flounce, but he should’ve seen it coming:

    Stabby lights the fuse:

    70 stabby Jul 4, 2013 13:04:47 0

    I have all ads blocked.
    Get Firefox, install adblockplus
    install no-script (a whitelist script stopper)
    Maintaining the whitelist does get in the way and it does take time, but NO ADS.

    Charles senses a threat to his meager livelihood

    88 Charles Jul 4, 2013 13:12:28 11

    What an asshole. If you’re trying to lose your account you’re going about it the right way.

    Takes decisive action and gets the vapors

    91 Charles Jul 4, 2013 13:14:58 15

    In fact, here’s a ‘being an asshole” timeout. I just can’t even.

    • iSpeakJive says:

      I still just can’t even believe a 60 year-old thought he was all hipN’shit saying I just can’t even.

  37. Bunk X says:

    Just because of the spread.

  38. Pakimon says:

    Time to play: Name That Bog Sycophant!

    http://tinyurl.com/k5fdp33

  39. OLT's He's Supposedly Aussie And Very Dickish says:

    windbag :
    And too full of themselves to shut up and learn anything.

    Made the mistakes of reading the comments. “bonzono” would make a great LGFr.

  40. OLT's Meanwhile The Country Is Burning Down says:

    livefreeor die :
    I’m surprised that Chuckie hasn’t read his latest marching orders from Media Matters and started viciously attacking Robert Gates. The s–t storm from his book is going to hit hard!

    Ho-hum. Robert Gates almost says what all of us have known for years. Obama didn’t care about Afghanistan, the WoT was a political football to the elite, and by the way Congress sucks and Gates hated them worse because they only care about getting reelected. Shocked, I am, shocked and appalled.

    Up next on Distraction TV: Liberals actually HATE Conservatives! Who knew?

  41. kbdabear says:

    Uh oh, Bike Boy is going to have to do a Twitter blitz denouncing the Washington Post as a bunch of bad crazy wingnuts. After all, the New York Times confirmed Ponytail’s conclusion that it was the youtube video

    “Former Guantanamo detainee implicated in Benghazi attack”

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/former-guantanamo-detainee-implicated-in-benghazi-attack/2014/01/07/c73fdf78-77d5-11e3-8963-b4b654bcc9b2_story.html?hpid=z4

  42. Because Pam Pam, Pam Pam, and Pam says:

    • Arachne says:

      And what national bestsellers have you written and what speakers’ forums are clamoring for YOUR presence, Blubberbutt? Hell, even the extreme LEFT doesn’t give a shit about you.

    • Doppel milyo and these sorts of things says:

      fat insignificant libelblogger Fuckface Johnson calls tea party Taliban and warns of Dominionist gulags and billions will die from global warming, er I mean climate change

  43. Achilles says:

    Off topic, but here is an amazing song. It is by a band called “Bad Religion”, who back in the day revolutionized punk rock by putting actual effort into their music. They are known for their great melodies, lyrics and haunting voice harmonies – this song really shows their talent. Even my mother loved this song.

    Even if you don’t like fast punk rock please give it a chance and check out the lyrics, which are in the description and tell you friend Achilles whatcha think.

  44. Achilles says:

    Ah what the heck, here are the lyrics. Amazing poetry:

    In the garden where he was cast out by the lord
    Flames an Omni-directional sword
    For he as ever failed to gather up the fruit
    And thus was banished with his loot

    He cantered aimlessly through endless permutations of night
    Seeking a purpose and the meaning of kin
    And when it finally came to him
    You could’ve mistook it for the meaning of sin

    The women wish him well
    Every time he cast off marching to hell
    Now if you’ve never seen a terrible sight
    Stroll the garden of earthly delight
    Maybe we can make it right – someday I’ll see you high above the

    Fields of Mars

    He knelt down before the unholy mob – who cried “WAR IS GOD!”
    Gleaming outwardly with great pride
    And prepared to die

    The women wish him well
    Every time he cast off marching to hell
    Now if you’ve never seen a terrible sight
    Stroll the garden of earthly delight
    Maybe we can make it right – someday I’ll see you high above the

    Fields of Mars

    Who cannot fight anymore
    Will never love any less
    That kid inside of murder
    Must be committed

    To live a life of hostility
    Never asking what it means
    When Mother Nation
    Blood and Religion
    Sanction killing upon the

    Fields of Mars

    High above the Fields of Mars

  45. Because Ahem says:

    • Doppel milyo and these sorts of things says:

      thank goodness your wife got the sense to leave you.

      that poor woman!

      you still sound bitter about it. was she sleeping with a guy in your band?

    • rightymouse says:

      Another solution would be to not marry financial losers like you, Charles. I doubt Patty left your sorry ass because you’re such a great money-maker.

      • OLT's I've Seen These Names Before says:

        Patty went all lesbian for Marcie, leaving Charlie in a lurch.

        His sports-based relationship with Lucy went nowhere.

        And Violet would never give him the time of day.

      • Because says:

        So who brought the fruit and water?

      • rightymouse says:

        Un-Mata Hari brought the fruit and water apparent ly. IIRC, that’s the story in the NY Times that broke Sharmuta’s heart.

      • rightymouse says:

        Patty was the name of his wife when the Mouse-Ka-Mania article on Charlie was written. It mentions her.

      • Because says:

        Patty must have had a big wagon.

    • OLT's OMG, Teh Poor Married Gheys says:

      Curious if you think divorce and shacking up are roads out of poverty, Stalker Charles.

      • Doppel milyo and these sorts of things says:

        Charles will say that a pro-marriage policy is racist

        …wait for it

      • Arachne says:

        Considering that even according to the article, 51% of unwed moms and their kids live in poverty, I’m trying to see what the down side is to marriage. Doesn’t matter, Great Society programs effectively destroyed the Black family in America, who until that time had a higher marriage rate than whites. But I guess Chuck hates everything traditional about America – you know, like getting a job.

        I thought he had two daughters or something like that. He never mentions them.

      • Arachne says:

        Well, I think this explains why we haven’t heard about un-Mata Hairy for awhile. Probably ran for her life.

  46. Arachne says:

    And anyone cares because why. Fatass?

  47. rightymouse says:

    Arachne :
    Well, I think this explains why we haven’t heard about un-Mata Hairy for awhile. Probably ran for her life.

    That’s my take too.

  48. Arachne says:

    rightymouse :

    Un-Mata Hari brought the fruit and water apparent ly. IIRC, that’s the story in the NY Times that broke Sharmuta’s heart.

    I remember that. And I’ve often wondered if that isn’t what Fatass intended – to make sure Sharmuta knew that there was no way there’d be a hookup – of course, this was AFTER he had the Times reporter talk to her. IIRC, there were several people that mentioned that they had spoken to the Times reporter – I wonder if he came away from those conversations convinced these guys were such sycophant loons that their testimony was useless.

    • rightymouse says:

      The Times talked with Sharmuta? That’s a new one for me. That whole mess was going down when most of us were already banned or rarely posting.

    • Doppel milyo and these sorts of things says:

      Andrea was a pathetic soul. I would have felt sorry for her if she hadn’t stabbed so many good people in the back.
      getting dumped and humiliated by Icarus was just what she deserved for being so awful

      • Because says:

        Yep, and the when she became completely unhinged, the hinge she left behind became rusty, and Icky took a picture, and it’s all legend.

        Somebody needs to write a country song about the Rusty Hinge of Sharmuta.

  49. Because says:

    Doppel milyo and these sorts of things :
    Charles will say that a pro-marriage policy is racist
    …wait for it

    But … but … but … ghey marriage!!!!

    • OLT's Let's All Denounce Him says:

      …creates poverty and is therefore wrong. Or at least that’s what Stalker Charles is implying.

      I had no idea he was such a hater of the gheys.

    • Abu Pretend to be Hetero, please. says:

      I support ghey marriage. Robin Roberts and Don Lemon would make a nice couple.

  50. OLT's Epic Poetry Cheap says:

    Because :
    Yep, and the when she became completely unhinged, the hinge she left behind became rusty, and Icky took a picture, and it’s all legend.
    Somebody needs to write a country song about the Rusty Hinge of Sharmuta.

    RUSTIHINJ de SHARMUTA

    On the shore of the great Pacific
    Beside the deep and tranquil waters
    Behind white gates and whiter people
    Lived the queen of chunky bloggers

    Long she dwelt amongst the lizards
    Briefly was she lizard queen
    Despite her gifts of fruit and water
    Fate wiped her karma scores all clean

    Sad her face and sad her singing
    Sorrow ever followed near
    While apologies to the king a-slinging
    He banned her friends and then banned her

    Sorrow overtook her mind then
    Witless wandered far and near
    Still she sought the chunky blogger
    Sought forgiveness with her tears

    Long ago the lizards lost her
    Far behind her, shout and jeers
    In the blog where once she counted
    Salty crackwhores hoot and cheer

    You ask, what of the chunky blogger?
    The cruel twist he gave the parting knife?
    Is his kingdom now but stronger
    Since he reigns alone, unwifed?

    Nay, the gods with cruelty cruelty pay
    And the chunky blogger shares her fate
    A swamp of echoes for his high chair
    And rusty hinges for his gates.

  51. Because says:

    Because :
    Yep, and the when she became completely unhinged, the hinge she left behind became rusty, and Icky took a picture, and it’s all legend.
    Somebody needs to write a country song about the Rusty Hinge of Sharmuta.

    The Ballad of the Rusty Hinge of Sharmuta

    There once was a gal on her hinge named Sharmuta,
    Fell for a clod named Icarus J.
    Thought she would go off with him in the sunset,
    But then she read the piece by Jonathan Dee.
    She read it and wept, all her dreams were so over,
    Jilted for some hoe named Un-Mata Hari
    Who brought Icky Johnson some fruit and some water,
    And all she could say is “Charles, I’m so sorry”.

    Off her hinge and to the wilds of the network,
    One day she was here and poof, she was gone…
    So Chuck took a picture of the hinge of Sharmuta,
    And posted it as brilliant internet art.

  52. Octopus says:

    Chunky told you to tweet that, dint he? 😆

    Hiya, Fatass! Heard you were closing in fast on three bills. How about a pic?

  53. Octopus says:

    Remember when you thought he was boiling a real frog, Fatass? Now THAT was funny! 😆

  54. Briareus says:

    Coming up: The Irish Rose Award.

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