Charles hates Mechanical Pencils

Hate is a common theme in Charles Johnson’s threads. He usually rants about Nazis, Tobacco companies, Glenn Greenwald and Ron Paul. But he occasionally picks different targets of his hatred towards life. In an odd post, Charles goes on a rant about mechanical pencils of all things. That’s right, mechanical pencils are as big a threat as the Ron Paul-Glenn Greenwald plot.

Mechanical Pencils Mechanical Pencils2

Charles is a miserable human being.

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127 Comments on “Charles hates Mechanical Pencils”

  1. rightymouse says:

    Gawd. He’s SO boring!!

  2. Doppel Milyo says:

    Charles, even when you type something your comment always smells like a Number two

  3. Because 1-800-MILYO says:

    Wood pencils cause deforestation.

  4. rightymouse says:

    Lest we forget…
    Yoga Town. House of Love. 😆

    • rightymouse says:

      You better go. Your boyfriend’s looking for you.

    • Arachne says:

      You know Frank I really question the wisdom of house arrest for sexual predators like yourself. But I understand that they handed out flyers in your neighborhood so I wouldn’t go knocking on doors for a cup of sugar.

  5. HaikuMan says:

    What Johnson is not:
    Sharpest pencil in the box.
    Thus, Johnson’s envy.

  6. Juan Epstein says:

    Hipper than hip.

  7. poteen2 says:

    2 Charles Johnson Sat, Nov 30, 2013 8:54:45am

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    I’ve now asked several times for you to NOT post such long quotes from articles, especially without making it clear that it’s a quote. I’m going to start deleting Pages that do this, because it’s a clear copyright violation.

    Seriously. Please pay attention to this comment, because I’m not going to say this again.
    3 Charles Johnson Sat, Nov 30, 2013 9:35:19am

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    As for the article, it’s just rote, by-the-numbers right wing anti-liberal agitprop.
    4 Charles Johnson Sat, Nov 30, 2013 10:17:27am

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    OK, I’ve edited the post to comply with these rules, but it’s the last time I’m going to do it. Next time I’ll just delete with no further explanation.

    3 comments, an edit and a threat for Floral Giraffe. Must really be a trouble maker.
    Come on over FG! Charlie’s the Fascist, in case you haven’t noticed yet. And mockingly wonderful at it.

  8. Doppel Milyo says:

    because fat geek

  9. Minnow says:

    Barry, you are such a control freak, and an asshole. Floral Giraffe is stepping way past her comfort zone to publish this stuff and is doing it as a way to gain favor from YOU dumbshit.

    And all you can do is snarl about what a stupe you think she is.

    God, you are an asshole.

  10. Bunk X says:

  11. Bunk X says:

    Gus made a funny.

  12. Octopus says:

    A movie about the art of sharpening pencils, which most of us mastered in kindergarten, albeit at the expense of over-sharpening several pencils into dirty sawdust. So worth it, though. The wastefulness was the thrill, the sheer destructive power of our little fist on the crank that turned the cutting-wheels. That little fist was destined for more wasteful cranking, in our adolescent years. Ah, the memories! That’ll put some lead in the old pencil, eh, Fatass?

    • Because 1-800-MILYO says:

      And the carbon footprint. The sexy, delicious, perverse carbon footprint. Lucifer Koch approves.

  13. Octopus says:

    Bunk X :
    Those who believe Wal-Mart pays too little should shop there and tip the employees 15-20%.

    Either that, or go to China and start another revolution, to free the slave-laborers who labor under unspeakable conditions for cruel, inscrutable masters, who then pass the savings on to you. Good luck with that! 🙂

  14. Octopus says:

    Chunky’s tirade against the mechanical pencil put me in mind of an incident I read about recently, where a fight over seating at a Comic Convention led to a stabbing. The implement of violence in this case? A mechanical pencil! Because nerds can improvise, and they knew that modernistic tool would come in handy someday. You don’t think it was our Fatass who got stabbed with the fearsome draftsman’s dirk, do you? 😯

  15. Octopus says:

    By Allah, he’s right!

    http://www.timesofisrael.com/al-qaeda-declares-foothold-in-the-west-bank/

    • St. Pancake says:

      “The religious right is trying mightily to redefine “religious freedom” as “license to impose our religion.””
      Translation: Hobby Lobby should be forced to pay for medical coverage they’re opposed to. This from the fascist blogger that if you don’t want to follow his rules, you’re banned. Those rules include blogging at OTHER sites he’s got nothing to do with and down dinging any of his warped logic babbling posts.

    • Doppel Milyo says:

      Charles should spend some time in Dearborn, or Tower Hamlets in England.

      just sayin’
      he has no idea what he’s talking about ( per usual )

    • The religious right is trying mightily to redefine “religious freedom” as “license to impose our religion.”

      I say this again because it is worth repeating, you ignorant twat:

      It never ceases to amaze me how douche-bag Leftoid illiberals such as Chunk are convinced that a group or organization that will not/cannot — out of religious conviction — be put in a position that goes against their beliefs, and therefore ‘deprives’ others of something they do not actually have a right to, are “forcing their religion on others”. The truth of the matter is that being compelled to pay for something that goes against one’s religious beliefs is, in fact, an infringement on the payer’s First Amendment rights. Taxpayers, all taxpayers, are coerced [by force] — [with] the threat of fines or imprisonment — to give their earned money [property] to another. Being compelled by the state to support someone else’s behavior that goes against my religious beliefs is tyranny, plain and simple.
      The issue is so clear as to be elementary. But shits like Chunk and his ilk are too power-hungry to accept this truth.

  16. rightymouse says:

    He actually tweeted this? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a putz. 😆

  17. Octopus says:

    I didn’t get to watch the game as I was travelling, but I can’t believe my Wolverines were in a position to ruin OSU’s season at the end, and failed on a botched 2-pt conversion attempt. I’m glad I didn’t have to watch that. 🙂

  18. Octopus says:

    Fatass is too ignint to understand Rosa Parks’ “bold stand” was a planned piece of civil disobedience, and that she was a savvy woman who knew exactly what she was doing. It was far from the “isolated act of individual courage” that it was mythologized to be, later.
    http://symonsez.wordpress.com/2010/12/05/the-factual-story-of-rosa-parks-and-the-montgomery-bus-boycott-flowed-like-an-orchestra/

    • Because 1-800-MILYO says:

      I think that’s what them intellectual dudbros call a ‘non sequitur’. Or some shit.

    • Because 1-800-MILYO says:

      And what you’re saying is completely true. One thing the Parks’ and Kings understood was how to pick your battles. They chose their venues, and made their points. Sharpton’s a pretty sorry excuse compared to them. He waits for something to happen that’s either completely bullshit (Brawly) or not a good example of racism (Zimmerman) and then tries to make them into teachable moments.

      Parks and King must be rolling in their graves. They’re probably also appealed from the hereafter that the ‘first black president’ turned out to be such a sorry dope.

    • Pakimon says:

      So id Rosa parks ended racism, what the hell is The Race Detective™ and The Justice Brothers endlessly squawking about?

      ‘Tis a mystery…

  19. Octopus says:

    Yes. Che comes to mind. Mao. Lenin. Lennon. Hell, there are lots of them! 😆

    You stooped, Chunky.

    • Octopus says:

      Wait…scratch Lennon.
      😆

      Co-opted!
      ———————————————–
      John Lennon, Closet Republican?
      JAMES JOYNER · WEDNESDAY, JUNE 29, 2011 · 26 COMMENTS

      While his best-known solo effort was “anti-religious, anti-nationalistic, anti-conventional, [and] anti-capitalistic,” John Lennon became a Reagan Republican a few years later, his assistant claims.

      WENN (“Lennon was a closet Republican: Assistant“):

      John Lennon was a closet Republican, who felt a little embarrassed by his former radicalism, at the time of his death – according to the tragic Beatles star’s last personal assistant.
      Fred Seaman worked alongside the music legend from 1979 to Lennon’s death at the end of 1980 and he reveals the star was a Ronald Reagan fan who enjoyed arguing with left-wing radicals who reminded him of his former self.
      In new documentary Beatles Stories, Seaman tells filmmaker Seth Swirsky Lennon wasn’t the peace-loving militant fans thought he was while he was his assistant.
      He says, “John, basically, made it very clear that if he were an American he would vote for Reagan because he was really sour on (Democrat) Jimmy Carter. He’d met Reagan back, I think, in the 70s at some sporting event… Reagan was the guy who had ordered the National Guard, I believe, to go after the young (peace) demonstrators in Berkeley, so I think that John maybe forgot about that… He did express support for Reagan, which shocked me.
      “I also saw John embark in some really brutal arguments with my uncle, who’s an old-time communist… He enjoyed really provoking my uncle… Maybe he was being provocative… but it was pretty obvious to me he had moved away from his earlier radicalism.
      “He was a very different person back in 1979 and 80 than he’d been when he wrote Imagine. By 1979 he looked back on that guy and was embarrassed by that guy’s naivete.”

    • Arachne says:

      Someone remind the Blubberwall that it was the GOP that supported the Civil Rights Act. Democrats like his buddy Al Gore’s daddy voted AGAINST it.

    • Arachne says:

      Oh and asshole, check your history.
      King was a REPUBLICAN.

      • Bunk X says:

        His father certainly was, but it really doesn’t matter because MLK was doing the right thing before Malcom X came along. (No relation.)

  20. Octopus says:

    rightymouse :
    Yeah. Well. Yoko is still loco.

    Her singing is to die for. Literally.

    • rightymouse says:

      I remember hearing her when her first album with the ‘Plastic Ono Band’ came out. What a set of lungs!! 😯

      • Octopus says:

        We had that album for a long time, and would play it for laughs occasionally. Her screeching is part of the soundtrack of my early life. We also used to blame her for breaking up the Beatles, but now I know the boys were just sick of being around each other, after nearly a decade of too much togetherness. Can’t blame them a bit.

      • rightymouse says:

        I’m sure the Yoko/John thing had something to do with the growing discontent, but Paul was no angel either.

      • Octopus says:

        No, Paul wasn’t any angel. Neither was George. Ringo was a drunken fool for years, before getting himself under control.

        Considering how the rock lifestyle has offed so many before, during and after the Beatles’ time, it’s pretty amazing how they came through it, given their unparalleled popularity and degree of adulation from all levels of society. Lennon paid the ultimate price for this godly adoration society.

  21. Arachne says:

    Octopus :

    We had that album for a long time, and would play it for laughs occasionally. Her screeching is part of the soundtrack of my early life. We also used to blame her for breaking up the Beatles, but now I know the boys were just sick of being around each other, after nearly a decade of too much togetherness. Can’t blame them a bit.

    Lennon had an interesting take on the whole Yoko and the Beatles breakup — “if you’re going to blame her for the Beatles breaking up, then you better give her credit for all the wonderful music that we’ve created individually.

    • Octopus says:

      Okay, but then I’m also going to blame her for all the horrid rubbish they delivered, in the post-Beatles era. They all had a few gems, but there was an awful lot of dreck! 😆

      • Arachne says:

        Especially since a lot of that horrid rubbish was delivered to us at the hands of her husband, who honestly believed her crap exhibited genuine talent.

    • Bunk X says:

      I read that last night. Norm MacDonald’s trolling wasn’t funny to me, just heckling. Hell, we do it every day, and we’ve been at it for longer. Penis x 3 LOL.

      • Octopus says:

        By “funny,” I guess I meant “true” and “devastating.” He punched their tickets and sent them into the Dumbth Show. I laugh at inappropriate times, including sad times, but mainly when I see libturds put in check.

  22. Because 1-800-MILYO says:

  23. rightymouse says:

    Arachne :
    Especially since a lot of that horrid rubbish was delivered to us at the hands of her husband, who honestly believed her crap exhibited genuine talent.

    Like this?? 😯

    • Octopus says:

      Lennon was a real artist, and a tortured soul. He had a lot of problems and deep contradictions in his nature. He was by far my favorite Beatle. What I didn’t understand about his odd behavior at the end of the Beatles thing, as chronicled in the movie, “Let It Be,” is that he was addicted to heroin at the time. Heroin changes everything, and kills most people who fall under its spell. To his credit, he managed to kick it and move on with his life.

  24. rightymouse says:

    ‘Cause Rosa & I were best buds!!!! That’s how I know!!!

  25. Whatever man says:

    ca·nard \kə-ˈnärd\ noun, a groundless rumor or belief.

    Ergo, Charles believes that racism cannot be ended.

    • dwells38 says:

      Chunk’s is pondscum. He doesn’t think anything because he’s not capable of it. The best he can do is regurgitate propaganda lies and cash a few checks from some sad losers. He doesn’t lift a finger to help people who are real victims of racism or any other worthy cause. He’s a liar and a poser and a lazy assed internet loudmouth.

    • Bunk X says:

      Racism cannot be ended as long as it’s being promoted by old white men like Charles Johnson.

  26. HaikuMan says:

    Bunk X :
    Gus made a funny.

    How does one support Walmart strikers while at the same time supporting a boycott of Walmart?— Gus (@Gus_802) November 30, 2013

    The Walmart strikers
    Were not Walmart employees.
    Support astroturf!

  27. swamprat says:

    waiting for downdingies…..

    13 Killgore Trout
    Sun, Dec 1, 2013 5:21:32pm reply/quote 1downupreport (+1 so far)

    Looks like Iran is going to use the opportunity of eased sanctions to expand their nuclear program.
    Russia, Iran Discuss New Nuclear Plant Project

    themoscowtimes.com

    AEOI asks for budget to expand nuclear plants: Salehi

    presstv.ir

  28. Juan Epstein says:

    Blacker than Joan Walsh.

  29. Octopus says:

    Bunk X :
    Racism cannot be ended as long as it’s being promoted by old white men like Charles Johnson.

    Racism is also deeply imprinted in the human genome. Racism within black and Asian cultures far outweighs white-on-black or white-on-“yellow” racism, as serious contributors to the actual stress-levels experienced by members of the black and asian races in America.

    • Octopus says:

      You would think Porky Icarus would recognize this publicity-scam from Amazon right off, being well-acquainted his own fat self with the risks of flying too close to the sun. Instead, he gave himself a tweetgasm with the concept last night.

  30. Because 1-800-MILYO says:

    Whatever man :

    ca·nard \kə-ˈnärd\ noun, a groundless rumor or belief.
    Ergo, Charles believes that racism cannot be ended.

    This is apparently waddling orders from Chunk’s head office:

    http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2013/12/01/3007041/gop-credits-rosa-parks-ending-racism/

  31. OLT's As A Matter Of Fact, They DO Bottle Stoopid says:

    Because 1-800-MILYO :
    Speaking of Special Moonbeams…
    http://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/186466-dnc-head-dems-can-run-and-win-obamacare
    She’s gotta be a bottle blond. Real blonds aren’t that dumb.

    Yeah, 90 proof at least.

  32. OLT's Big Ponytailed Emopotamus Babysitter says:

    Snicker. Stalker Charles went after CBS on Twitter for being “anti-Obama”.

    Snort.

    Guffaw.

    Hey, Stalker Charles: who watches over the actions of your twelve blogdwellers while you’re off making an ass of yoursefl on Twitter?

  33. dwells38 says:

    Octopus :You would think Porky Icarus would recognize this publicity-scam from Amazon right off, being well-acquainted his own fat self with the risks of flying too close to the sun. Instead, he gave himself a tweetgasm with the concept last night.

    Yeah it’s hard to believe he took it seriously. Shows what a naïve pinhead he is. It’s not even legal in US airspace. There’s an issue of safety and then the things will inevitably be hacked and stolen. In some neighborhoods it would be a matter of sport to try and knock one down or trap it while it’s down which would be simple with say, an overturned trash can.

    Amazon obviously is trying to take a page from the Google playbook. Google does invent and/or develop technological products and solutions (self driving cars, Google Glass). And it does wonders for their share price as investors see that, not only are they making money now, they also have innovative coals in the fire for the changing future landscape. I don’t dislike Amazon but this just seems like a me too marketing ploy.

    • dwells38 says:

      Funny that the Chunkster spent yesterday hyperventilating over a silly illegal drone delivery concept all day yesterday on Twitter. Nary a word about the just-passed deadline on Obunglecare and the fact that the website is still a shambles. And yes he really did take the drone thing totally seriously but fears the librotarians will ruin the whole thing:

      26 Charles Johnson
      Sun, Dec 1, 2013 5:48:04pm replyquote 3downupreport

      I’m picturing a lot of cognitive dissonance among the libertarian techies. DRONES ARE EVIL.
      — Charles Johnson (@Green_Footballs) December 2, 2013

      Amazon needs to call them “bots” or “fliers” or something other than drones. That word’s been thoroughly demonized.

      — Charles Johnson (@Green_Footballs) December 2, 2013

      Read more at http://littlegreenfootballs.com/article/42825_The_Keith_Jarrett_Trios_Gorgeous_Performance_of_Never_Let_Me_Go/comments/#AuAKlvBEmMZuzsVz.99

      • Because 1-800-MILYO says:

        Lack of self-awareness, too.

        “drones. That word’s been thoroughly demonized.”

        Look in the mirror, Chunk.

      • iSpeakJive says:

        Yeah, Chucky. People are so stupid they are going to think Amazon will shoot them from the sky if they don’t pay their Amazon credit card bill.
        Chuck, you are officially a moron.

      • Because Milyo says:

        I think there’s a clause in the Obamacare act that authorizes insurance companies to shoot deadbeat customers from drones.

      • Arachne says:

        No, Blubberwall, there won’t be any cognitive dissonance (do you even KNOW what that means?) because only an idiot like you thought this was REAL. The rest of us have more than one synapse and realized it was just a joke – an over the top ad for Amazon Prime Air.

        But then again, you’re the twit who saw Nazi symbols in the Tennessee flag. The best part of this, of course, is the way you’ve beclowned yourself on Twitter.

  34. Because she better not go hatin' on my mechanical pencil says:

  35. rightymouse says:

    Thread’s getting a bit od, eh?? 🙂

  36. Abu's Apologies to Limericks Everywhere says:

    A blogger called Charles we once knew,
    He was making money with thousands of views,
    But as time moved along,
    Charles’ worldview went wrong,
    Deciding: screw success, I’ll just ban you! And you. And you.

    X – 10,000 times till the POS was broke.
    / hit the tip jar!

  37. Octopus says:

    Chunky reminisces about Pamela, in song:

    Bonus: an early appearance by Miss Minka Kelly. 🙂